Some people decide, for a variety of reasons, that they are morally opposed to expressing their own personal same-sex orientation. However, they refrain from the lie that anyone can “change” their sexual orientation.
In fact, some of these people acknowledge that no significant change of sexual orientation occurs in most (if any) so-called ex-gays.
Depending upon the context, a lifetime of celibacy may be depressing, self-defeating, a bit selfish, or even unloving. Do we at Truth Wins Out strongly encourage it? Not especially. But what people choose to do (or not do) with themselves is their business.
However, when celibate gay people present the public with celibacy as an honest alternative to the fraudulent healings of the ex-gay movement, some politically correct ex-gays are bound to retaliate.
Lately, at least one politically correct ex-gay activist — we are told — has given the Canadian ex-gay group New Directions a piece of his mind. Ex-gay opposition to honest talk about celibacy goes something like this:
Everyone is on a journey towards heterosexuality, but some people only go a little way down that road.
What rubbish. This antithesis of sexual honesty, frequently peddled by the leadership of Exodus International, honors the sex-idol of “heterosexuality” — the heterosexual sex act and the heterosexual label — and not God.
“A journey toward heterosexuality” is the catch phrase of ex-gay activists who promote years of wandering on circular roads to nowhere. Despite the claim to be a former homosexual, no professional ex-gay has demonstrated significant attraction to the opposite gender. Their sexual orientation has not been changed — not by God, not by James Dobson, and not by magic-wand therapies that obsess over fictitious “possessive mothers,” “distant fathers,” non-existent abusive relatives, fake exorcisms, or ex-gay doctor-patient “cuddle” sessions.
So let’s scrap the “journey” hogwash. I think it would be more honest of these professional ex-gays if they simply told celibate gay men:
You are inferior to us, and exiled to the back of the church, unless you prove your sexual prowess through weekly public profession of orgasms with people of the opposite sex.
Celibate Christian College Jay is not impressed that an ex-gay activist would denigrate celibacy while idolizing “hope” in an end-goal of sex:
I got a little mad when I first read that, but then it saddened me. It saddened me to know that there are people who would sell out Christ for something as fleeting as human sexuality.
Jay may be saddened, but he cannot be very surprised.
Exodus International is led by a president who publicly belittles celibacy. Exodus does not promote ostensibly Christian values such as truth, fellowship, or love; Exodus demands something else: Sexual dishonesty, alienation from people who are sexually honest, and various stunts to blackmail God into effecting inspecific “change.”
Of the two ex-gay factions — the celibates, and those like Chambers who idolize the sexual expression of “masculinity” — which one is more likely to enjoy huge donations, public recognition, and applause from a right-wing church and right-wing culture that idolize expressions of male authority?
Is either faction capable of promoting individual freedom, charity, modesty, and respect for religious and sexual minorities — or do both factions’ obsessions with self-denial, sex, and political access pre-empt compassion, generosity, and affirmation toward others?










I also have to say this goes for the Roman Catholic church and other denominations that make a distinction between “practice” and orientation. While its a step in a positive direction to final acceptance of gay people as full sexual beings, what bible publishers have done is taken liberties at adding to the Bible and in effect given Paul the knowledge between gay “practice” and gay orientation and now refer that Paul all along was speaking of “practice”. Wrong! This is a grave error on their part and one that should be corrected.
I’ve temporarily prohibited further comments from Anthony Falzarano due to his repeated violations of the previously stated guidelines for civil discourse.
He is welcome to return after he acknowledges the guidelines and demonstrates an ability and willingness to honor them.
1 Corinthians 6:9-11 says neither the greedy nor slanderers nor swindlers shall inherit the kingdom of Heaven.
In other words, it seems to be describing hucksters like Anthony Falzarano.
It’s a good thing I’m not a fundamentalist. Unlike the Bible, I don’t damn Falzarano to hell.
Addendum: Before claiming to know CDC statistics regarding HIV/AIDS, Falzarano should actually take some time to read them.
Michael Airhart…Now I remember one of the reasons I decided to leave the gay lifestyle behind…because of miserable QUEENS like you. What’s wrong Michael someone finally has been able to confound your gay agenda and lies with TRUTH, so now you want to kick me out of your sandbox (blog)? Grow-up! Many ex-gays such as Chambers and myself have tried to reason with you. As the bible says; “it’s like throwing our pearls before swine”! you have been enlightened with the TRUTH. If you reject it and continue to spread your lies about the normalcy” of the gay lifestyle…You will be accountable some day!
Ken’s comment here became stuck in a spam filter. I have released the comment, and I encourage Roy to read it.
I remain eager for ex-gay persons, or individuals sympathetic to ex-gays, to defend or explain the opposition of Exodus and Focus to gay celibacy.
“I decided to leave the gay lifestyle behind”
If that’s true, then why is “the gay lifestyle” your only source of income? Why can’t Anthony Falzarano hold gainful employment, unless it involves talking about man-on-man sex?
And you got it all backwards when you refer to the “swine”, and “miserable queens”. That would be guys like yourself and Chambers – on the outside, looking in. Falzarano can’t even go a single day without thinking or talking about homosex – and he’s the happy one?
Mr. Falzarano and others in the anti-gay movement are obsessed with the extreme behavior of some gay men and foolishly think it’s reasonable to broadbrush all gay men with the foibles of a few. They add to this the illogical notion that their personal experience in the so-called ‘lifestyle’ is what every gay man experiences or should experience. Using these false premises they proceed to draw some grim picture that they use to freak out (and sometimes titillate) straights and scare the hell (literally) out of gays. When called on this snow job they then proceed to lash out in a manner that is beyond juvenile and renders irrelevant any points they might have. The kicker of course is they remain convinced that they should be taken seriously and are operating in a reasonable and loving manner.
PW:
And that’s one of the reasons why the “ex-gays” will never be accepted by gay people – they believe all gay people had the same personal experiences, have the same addictions, have the same number of sex partners, etc. And they won’t accept “you’re wrong about that” for an answer.
I’m sorry to inform Mr. Falzarano that most gay people I’ve ever associated with hasn’t even slept with 1/4 of the number of men he’s slept with. 400 men? How many men is that a day? Did he have a neon “OPEN 24 HOURS” sign in his bedroom window?
The good thing is America is growing tired of gaping s***s like Anthony Falzarano pointing their fingers at everyone else but themselves. People are going to get sick and disgusted of skanky tramps with a bible in hand, trying to force their own nasty pasts down everyone else’s throats, and trying to brainwash everyone else into believing they’re guilty of the same things.
Oh Scott, Someday your vitrolic remarks will come back and bite you when ex-gays will have a hate-crime bill written for them. If an ever-straight posted similar remarks that you have said about me on the internet you would probably be screaming hate crime…hate crime. What’s the matter are you feeling guilty about all the lies that you have told about the gay community??? Your “tales of deceit” will crumble under the honesty of the ex gay movement???
THe ex-gay movement is the monkey wrench in the finely-tuned motor of the “gay political Rolls Royce”. The Church and the government are finally listening to the testimonies of the tens of thousands of ex-gays that are telling them what really goes on in the gay world.
For every soul that you “trick” into the gay lifestyle I promise you that you will give an account to God for someday. The ex-gay movement is here to say. People like you and Wayne Besen and Airheart might be winning some of the battles but God will win the WAR when HE comes back to judge the lambs and the wolves…What side will you be on Scott…THe Right or the LEFT????
You’re really not worth the time, but I’ll humour you:
“If an ever-straight posted similar remarks that you have said about me on the internet you would probably be screaming hate crime…hate crime.”
Uh, no – I would say “so nothing’s new today, compared to yesterday, last week, last month, and last year”.
“What’ the matter are you feeling guilty about all the lies that you have told about the gay community???”
Unlike you, I don’t have to resort to fiction.
If anyone should be feeling guilty about being a liar, you should look in the mirror.
“THe ex-gay movement is the monkey wrench in the finely-tuned motor of the “gay political Rolls Royce”.”
No, the “ex-gay movement” is just a desperate monkey on the back of the gay community – their only means of income, beings most are too unstable to be around normal people.
“tens of thousands of ex-gays”
Where?
“For every soul that you “trick” into the gay lifestyle”
I don’t know what “lifestyle” you’re talking about – since I haven’t been to a gay bar in about 2 years, haven’t been to a pride parade since the late 90′s, and have no use for the “gay strip” in town.
But if you mean if I can trick people into becoming music addicts and collectors like myself, I’d be doing the gay community a favor – beings most people associated with that above-mentioned “gay strip” has lousy taste in music to begin with. f**k Kylie!
“I promise you that you will give an account to God for someday”
Impossible – I don’t believe in fairy tales.
“the WAR when HE comes back to judge the lambs and the wolves…What side will you be on Scott…THe Right or the LEFT????”
Well, beings I don’t prey on innocent and mentally confused and vulnerable people, like yourself and the rest of the wolves, I suppose I’d be with the lambs.
Anything else?
AF: “People like you and Wayne Besen and Airheart [And don't forget me, Emproph (but you can call me Patrick if it makes it easier to "love" me)] might be winning some of the battles but God will win the WAR when HE [because God has a penis] comes back to judge the lambs and the wolves…What side will you be on Scott…THe Right or the LEFT????”
Actually I think it’ sheep and goats:
—–
Personally, I think lambs and wolves makes much more sense (I’ve been arguing about that with God for years).
Sheep/Goats, lambs/wolves, right/left, up/down, please turn off your cell phones/you are free to move about the cabin — where’ anyone even supposed to draw a line anymore? Certainly not at 31,000 feet! (unless you want to get arrested when you land, twice).
Anyway, it’ clear that Scott, Besen, AirHART, and me, et al, will have QUITE a bit to say about you when we meet (or not) our maker.
Have you even read your own book? Good God Man, you “advise’ parents that their kids are “lying, manipulating and deceiving,” simply because they are attracted to the same gender!
It’ SINFULLY slanderous.
Yet you have the gall to title your book after a line from 1 Corinthians 6:9-11
–
Mr. Falzarano, you’ve got some washing to do yet.
Mr. Falzarano, I don’t doubt that you and others have benefited from leaving some very destructive habits and behavior patterns. I don’t doubt that you have developed strong aversions to many of the things you’ve done. I don’t doubt that you sincerely believe you’ve made the right choices and that your choices are God-inspired and directed. But none of this, and I repeat none of this, gives you the right and privilege to declare war against gays and lesbians. And that is the point that Mr. Airhart and Mr. Besen are constantly pointing out. This not about denying you the right to your choices and experience, this is about standing up and saying to you that we will not stand idly by and let you stereotype and scapegoat us. We will not be silent while you fan the fires of discrimination. And we will resist to the end your goal of depriving us of our rights as human beings.
Back to the original subject, I would add that another factor plays into the disdain some ex-gays show for those who are celibate but honest about their sexual orientation: that factor is the disdain (albeit passive disdain) that conservative churches have for singles in general. Unlike Catholicism which has a tradition of revering celibacy for the sake of faith and thus in a more general way respects single people, Evangelical Christianity views (or seems to view) celibacy as merely a stage of life, a stepping stone to the ‘higher calling’ of marriage. The state of being single either by choice or by circumstance is not honored. No special support is offered to those who give up their sexuality for the sake of faith. So it’s not surprising that ex-gays (who after all are seeking the acceptance of conservative churches) have adopted the same bias and bought into the nonsense that licensed and practicing heterosexuals are spiritually superior to everyone else.
PW the bible is very clear in 1 Corinthians when it says that “the higest way to serve the Lord is to remain celibate however if you burn (or Lust) it is best that you take a spouse. I speak at Churches and civic groups all over thsi country and I strongly speak out when ever I see th double-standard of hetero sexual sin (being sometimes minimalized) vs gay sexual sin (being considered more grevious) 1 Corinthians 6:9-11 does not descriminate between any kind of sexual immorality. It is all lumped together as the kind of sexual behavior that will keep people who participate in that kind of behavior fro “inheriting the kingdom of God” And in the same vain giving yourself to God as a spiritual eunuch is “celebrated” in the bible. Many Protestants will not give a pulpit to an unmarried man. This is clearly unbiblical. So on these points I agree with you wholeheartedly!!!
Scott, What you may not realize is that as Christians we are told to love evryone (even those we may consider our enemies). We are taught to be tolerant of those who are challenged by their sexual preferences. I love my gay friends. I might disagree with their lifestyle and their preference but I still care form them. God called me out of the gay lifestyle and has now sent me back into this community to tell them about the freedom they can have from the “lifetsyle” if they would truly turn to HIM and obey His commands.
Having said this, The gay community has earned the disdain of America and the Christian Churches (and other religions) because you have organized as lobbyist organization and other the “guise” of gay rights you are shoving your immoral lifestyle down our throats. That’s why we have been forced to oragnize against you and fight your lies. If you really just wanted “to be left alone” most of America wouldn’t care less about you. However when you begin to come after our children sexually and with your propaganda in our schools it is then when we must stand-up against your actions!
Sorry for the typos I forgot to do an spell check AAF
Sorry for the typos, I forgot to do a spell check…AAF
Mr. Falzarano, I don’t buy your explanation that ‘Christians’ suddenly woke up and decided to get organized because some gays and lesbians decided to engage in political debate via lobbying. And given that the religious right has no problem using the political system to shove their views down other people’s throats I think you (and others) might want to retire this oft-used and lame argument, as the saying goes ‘people in glass houses shouldn’t cast stones’. Furthermore for you to invoke ‘propaganda’ is laughable as you regularly and consistently engage in propaganda and worse. Against the tone your words set, the attitude you display, your claims of loving others ring completely hollow.
I totally agree with that last sentence, PW.
And talk about propaganda – that entire paragraph was propaganda.
I can’t waste much more time on Anthony “Grand Canyon” Falzarano, but I have to reply to this one line: “of gay rights you are shoving your immoral lifestyle down our throats.”
Uh, I’m not the one informing everyone exactly how many men I’ve slept with, and giving all the gory details. You, on the other hand, are shoving your sex life, and your 400 sexual encounters down everyone’s throat. And you say it as if it’s a badge of honor. s**t.
“However when you begin to come after our children sexually and with your propaganda in our schools it is then when we must stand-up against your actions!”
In almost every case, when somebody tries to tie gay people with pedophiles, it’s THAT particular accuser you need to keep an eye on, and keep your kids away from.
And let’s not forget Mike Ensley of Exodus, and pretty much all the other well-known “ex-gays” have already been distributing their “ex-gay” propaganda in schools.
Obviously the Grand Canyon’s book and “comeback” are major flops from the get-go, because all he seems to be doing is trolling GLBT-oriented blogs and websites. It’s a lost cause anyway – America may not be all that comfortable yet with gay people, but they already know the “ex-gays” are lunatics and frauds. You can partly thank your ridiculous “ex-gay cuddling therapy” friend (Cohen) for that.
One thing I just had to point out is something mentioned in Grand Canyon’s website bio:
“Anthony’s new book ‘And Such Were Some of You! One Man’s Walk Out of the Gay Lifestyle’ is rapidly moving up Amazon.com’s popular book list”
According to the book page on Amazon:
Amazon.com Sales Rank: 447,489
http://www.amazon.com/Such-Were-Some-You/dp/1606473867/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1220125318&sr=8-1
How is that “RAPIDLY” moving up on Amazon’s popular list? It’s not rapidly moving, nor is the book on Amazon’s popular book list (which I believe is only 100 titles).
And you gotta love the glowing 5-star sock puppet reviews, which has nothing to do with the book itself.
“In almost every case, when somebody tries to tie gay people with pedophiles, it’ THAT particular accuser you need to keep an eye on, and keep your kids away from.” – Scott.
Well said, Scott. As a teacher who has worked with young people over many years, I can testify to the wisdom of that piece of advice.
Dear PF. I point out in my book And Such Were Some of You that “most homosexuals who have been sexually molested are agahast by what happened to them in their childhood and wouldn’t even think about touching a child in an unholy manner” HOWEVER 50% of child molesters come from the hetero population and the other 50% come from the homosexual population. On the surface that seems balanced however 5% of the population (homosexual % of America) is producing 50% of the child molesters. Something is dead wrong! The fact is that molestees become molestors. Check the data!
Dear PF: before you read Grand Canyon’s fictional “data”, read this post, from somebody who actually takes part in busting would-be online predators and such.
This is from somebody who’s actually interested in busting REAL child molestors, and not somebody (like Falzarano) who would rather point the finger at gay people and waste EVERYONE’S time, while REAL child molestors get away with what they’re doing:
http://www.wikisposure.com/Redirections#Americans_For_Truth_Redirection_-_November_2007
“Perverted-Justice.com and our Wikisposure Project have many gay volunteers. We’re proud to have reached out to the homosexual community and even prouder still of those in the homosexual community who step forward to address the issue of pedophiles in society.
First, obviously, homosexuality has nothing to do with pedophilia. Homosexuality is a sexual orientation involving two consenting adults. That, there is nothing wrong with, not one bit. However, pedophilia is a dangerous sexual fetish… it has more in common with other sexual fetishes such as those who are into beastiality, foot fetishes, asphyxiation, etc. Pedophilia is the most dangerous sexual fetish of any we can think of off the top of our head. Pedophilia and homosexuality have nothing to do with one another, not even on some remote out of this world scale. To slur homosexuals by comparing them to pedophiles is ignorant.
There are only two groups that will try to compare homosexuals to pedophiles. Pedophiles themselves, trying to gain sympathy… and right-wing religious organizations trying to demonize homosexuals. Not surprising, then, that so many leaders of such organizations that do so end up being pedophiles themselves. Why… oh why… would any organization appalled by homosexuals pass up attacking a pedophile over a homosexual? The answer is obvious to us.”
I’m almost convinced that Anthony is just trying to save his hide. Keep an eye on him, ALL parents.
And here’s a more in-depth post related to the link I just posted above.
Who would you rather believe – an expert with real experience, or a phony expert who’s just solely obsessed over homosex?:
http://www.evilvigilante.com/?archive=165
“The idea that areas which accept homosexuality are more prone to adult males molesting underage boys is not borne out by our many experiences. When we worked Northern California, we were exactly an hour away from San Francisco and Oakland, the largest concentrated amount of open and “out” homosexuals in the country. We had figured we would be awash with homosexual men arriving to have sex with underage minors. This wasn’t the case, those who showed up were, in almost all cases, married men.”
“We chronicle actual stories of molestations that occur due to internet solicitations. Over 90% of cases we’ve seen are males luring females. Our foundation helped locate a 13 year old girl who was lured over a year by a 47 year old man. She was abducted, chained, tortured and raped over a two week period. The vast majority of internet abduction cases we’ve seen are focused on luring females.”
“Confusing the above is exactly what pedophiles want you to do. We wrote that there are only two groups that try to associate pedophiles with homosexuals. Right-wing religious organizations and pedophiles themselves. You do it to try to demonize homosexuals. They do it to try to gain acceptance for their desires. When you sit there and try to claim that pedophilia has a common cause with homosexuality, you are literally playing right into what pedophiles WANT you to do.”
This little trick of pointing to the percentage of male pedophiles who molest boys, and then comparing it with the much lower percentage of male homosexual teleiophiles (i.e. ordinary gay males who are attracted to other adult males) in the population, is a popular one with homophobics.
It depends on a false assumption, namely that male homosexual teleiophiles and homosexual pedophiles are the same people. They can be, of course, but they seldom are. The degree of overlap between the two groups is much smaller than the degree of overlap between heterosexual teleiophiles and homosexual pedophiles.
There was a time when this trick could be excused on the grounds of ignorance. Nowadays it is more likely to be due to simple dishonesty.
Sorry to spoil the fun — I’ve rebanned Anthony Falzarano (who was never un-banned) due to his ongoing failure to acknowledge and follow previously stated guidelines for commenter conduct. His presence during the past week was due to my being offline.