LesBePure.com was launched in 2008 by Kori Ashton. Kori’s journey is filled with religion, fame and finally freedom – True Freedom!
As a pastor’ daughter Kori Ashton grew up in the church and a very religious environment. She committed her heart to God at four years old and began dreaming of traveling the world singing for Jesus. 
However, Kori’ feelings of same sex attraction began at this early age as well. She was taught that those feelings were sinful and that she could never admit to them, much less act on them. Homosexuality seemed to be the worst sin possible. Her secret struggle began and it would last for more than 25 years.
Kori attended private Christian school her whole life so at 18 when it was time to go off to college the natural step was to attend Bible college – Southwestern Assemblies of God University in Texas. Within two weeks she had already met her first girlfriend who was another pastor’ daughter. SAGU is adamantly against homosexuality, so again Kori knew better than to be open about her feelings. She fought to keep her sexual desires secret so that she could attend the University and keep up the appearance of a “healthy, normal Christian.” She even dated guys to help camouflage her lesbian relationships. She was “outted” in 1995 and immediately kicked out.
It was inevitable to feel regret and confusion in a situation like this. Kori had been reared to believe a certain way, and everything she had been living for said that she was a hypocrite and a failure. She began to weigh it all out, and decided that the shame of being a lesbian was too overwhelming. Pushing all of her true feelings deep inside, she confessed her “sins”, renounced being gay and was allowed to re-attend SAGU in 1996. Over the next few years Kori would have multiple partners – all secret relationships with fellow, female students. But the fear of being a disappointment and disgrace to her family would soon take its toll.
Wanting to please others — Kori decided once again to suppress her sexual desires and attempt to become the “ideal” Christian, young lady. She left SAGU in 1999 and rekindled her dream of singing around the world for Jesus. Along with a few friends, Kori started a Christian band called “Exit” and began using the title “Ex-Gay” for publicity. Word spread quickly about the band and almost overnight they began working with Exodus International, Exodus Youth, PFOX, Focus on the Family and several other ex-gay affiliates. Kori founded MyTrueFreedom.net — an ex-gay website helping kids and young adults who struggled with same-sex attraction and within two years it had over 180,000 viewers.
As a band Exit’s first gig was opening for the Christian band Skillet and it wasn’t long before they was touring the United States and opening for bands like Tree 63, David Crowder, Pillar, Third Day and others. Kori ministered side by side with several well-known icons of the ex-gay circle like Sy Rogers in Florida and Dennis Jernigan in Oklahoma. They recorded 3 CDs and their music was heard on the radio around the world via Calvary Satellite Network.
In 2000 Exit was the featured band for the youth portion of the Exodus International National Conference in Chicago, IL. Through the years Kori’s band ministered at Cornerstone Festival with Exodus Youth, many Love Won Out Conferences across the United States and was the featured speaker and worship team for many ex-gay events.
Well on the way to fame in the Christian market, Kori’s schedule kept her so busy that it was becoming easier for her to ignore her homosexual feelings. Years passed and Kori decided to become a solo artist (Kori Ashton Band) and continued in the ex-gay ministry, now as a full time worship pastor of a large church
in Idaho where she led five worship services to over 9,000 people per week.
Kori was at last living her dream — singing for Jesus and sharing God’ love — but somehow she was still quietly hurting and lonely. She had been so preoccupied with creating an image of a “Perfect Christian,” she had ignored who she truly was. After leaving the full-time ministry in 2004, Kori turned and faced her struggle. Through counseling and mentoring, personal discovery and family support, Kori found a balance of her sexual identity and her faith!
“It has been a lot of tears and prayers, but I am blessed to say that I am now Ex-Ex Gay. No label fits me better than “Set Free!” The manipulation of the condemning so-called “Christians” (not true examples of Christ) with their failed rehabs and the self-abuse of needed perfection is NO MORE! God’s Word is Truth – Nothing can separate us from His Love!
I have never known God’ peace and grace like I do now. I have realized that my imperfection keeps me on my knees, looking to God and not to people for my acceptance. He truly loves me for me. I wouldn’t go back and do things differently. The road I’ve traveled has been the scenic route, but it has led me to the feet of God where I rest in His Grace knowing that I am His design, His joy and His perfection!”
Today Kori has traveled to 8 countries sharing God’ Truth and can be found leading worship at local churches. She has performed at Pride festivals and events in south Texas singing about her personal evolution. (See Kori’s Songs)
When she launched LesBePure.com in 2008 her goal was to have a safe place online where women could go to learn more about finding their own balance of faith and sexuality. She wanted to create a resource for the lesbian community to discover a new way to rethink, respond and react!
Kori and her partner Rebecca are engaged and will be married June 2010. Now wouldn’t Oprah call that a “Full Circle Moment!”??
“Homosexuality seemed to be the worst sin possible.”
Seems that this is the case with religion nowadays, especially in the US. Ahh if only intolerance seemed to be the worst sin possible. Or selfishness, ignorance, warmongering, hypocrisy, lying, murder…I just can’t imagine religion surviving at all if it did not have the sex taboos and gender stereotypes to keep them afloat.
“Kori founded MyTrueFreedom.net — an ex-gay website helping kids and young adults who struggled with same-sex attraction”.
“Helping”? “Helping”?! I can’t believe you said that – they weren’t helping same sex attracted people, they were reinforcing self-loathing and oppression.
Priya:
I did not write that. I copied and pasted. :)
I agree, that Kori should maybe revisit that phrase.
I see, sorry Wayne.
Hi Priya – At that point in my life I had been pulled into the mentality of Exodus International and I thought I was “Helping” kids/teens. I know now that I certainly was not! I see that 9 years ago I had not really dealt with my own sexuality and in my own denial and deception I sadly hurt my brothers and sisters in Christ.
I have reconciled and prayed for forgiveness. Launching http://www.LesBePure.com has been my attempt to share my journey and encourage others to find a balance between their faith and sexuality.
I will certainly revisit the phrase . Thank you for your feedback.
Thanks for sharing, Kori. The ex-gay and anti-gay world seems to be obsessed with the male end of the spectrum, obsessing over male-male sexual practices and the lurid underbelly of gay-male culture. Little is paid to the female side. Maybe because they think what we do is “not really sex” but just “confusion” among women. I’m not really sure whether to be more insulted that they don’t really think I’m embodying a legitimate orientation or more insulted that they consider my orientation to be evil. I’m glad attention is being paid to female-queers in this article.
Thanks Kori.
Well done, Kori. Good to hear that Israel has finally escaped from Egypt.
Thank you for posting your story. My parents were religious, but when I first came out at 13, I was told that I could not be Gay. This rhetoric was repeat over and over. I also tried to suppress my feelings, but in the end I had to face them. I’ve had to work really hard to face some of my own interal homophobia, but I am out now and happy for it.
I also like your message that you can be proper and respectable and Gay.
Wonderful feedback and encouragement everyone! Thank you so much!! Blessings!
No, thank you Kori for sharing your story and helping people accept themselves. We are honored to have you reaching out to those who are struggling to find unconditional love, self-acceptance and reconcile faith and religion.
How sadly typical this story. someone insisting for years that they’re ‘ex-gay’ and that its totally possible, while the whole time they know its a sham that they’re being forced into it by society.
“Today Kori has traveled to 8 countries sharing God’ Truth”
You mean she traveled to 8 countries hawking Christianity.
Kori, I believe I saw a couple members of your former band at a Love Won Out in Orlando, in 2001. (I wrote about it for a gay newspaper called Watermark). I also perused the MyTrueFreedom website for background on that and another article. I’m now wondering what happened to other people I talked to at that Love Won Out. Eight years can change a lot!
People can lie to themselves for a very long time, especially when they’re financially and spiritually invested in the lie. I don’t blame you. It’s obvious that you’ve genuinely wanted to help others for a very long time, and sometimes help can be sorely misguided. The lies can get so thick, the liar can almost convince herself they’re truth. But it doesn’t last forever. When it comes to ex-gay stuff, I often think of a song Clint Black (country artist) sang: “So we tell ourselves/that what we’ve found is what we meant to find/so we tell ourselves/can’t believe the things a heart can tell a mind/somehow we sell ourselves on love…”
I am glad that you have found your truth now. Congratulations to you and your fiancee on your engagement, too–isn’t it wonderful to know you *can*? LesBePure isn’t my cup of tea, but the wonderful thing about coming out is that we can be open about all of ourselves. You are helping to illustrate the diversity of our community, and you strive to offer real help and fellowship rather than teaching people how to lie to themselves. Great story, great to read.
Why are making this stuff up?
GreenEyedLilo – Thank you for your kind words. It’s humbling to share with people close to me about my struggle and journey – it’s even more difficult to display it for the world to see :)
But my thinking is that usually people are only closeted about things they are shameful of or they remain there due to fear. I was open about being Ex-Gay. I want to be just as open about finding this peaceful place with Jesus. I’m sure some like MorrisBerman listed below your comment will think this stuff is fantasy. But Truth is – there are many people like me out there who long for a relationship with God and feel “too dirty” for Him because of the poor example of our Church today. LesBePure is my attempt to bridge that gap through education and encouragement.
As for others that were there at the conference – I’ve lost touch with many of them. I do know of other Ex-Gay people who now identify once again as LGBT. Some are Christians – Some are not. Seems like Clint Black got it right! Becky and I both say thanks for the “congrats”!
Thank you TWO for featuring Kori’s story! The launch of her new website, LesBePure, with it’s unique forum for ‘sisters’,plus the FB discussion group Mend The Gap, have all been a TREMENDOUS help and blessing to me, who is just ‘out’ at 46! “LATE BLOOMER-SISTERS, come out, come out, whereever you are!” And then come join us on the LesBePure Forum!!!
Thanks for sharing. I am so thankful for my lesbianism because it caused me to seek TRUTH and leave the counterfeit American Christianity.
Praise God for all that He is doing — and I am blessed to be a part of His true remnant.
John 8:31
I am fully broken right now, not only do I feel for Kori and others, but I think that we have forgotten how sacred the Word is. Christ came to save the world from sin, but asked us to then sin no more. I am not perfect-far from. However-how can we believe parts of the Bible and then ignore other parts. Love sometimes needs to be tough love. I am crying out in the name of Christ-if you desire true freedom, get your the Holy Bible and go away from everyone else. Pray and then be still, listen to the Lord speak. Tell God all your problems, your questions, your faults, your feelings, yell at God, cry to God. But listen also. He will answer. May we all operate truly in the spirit God placed in each one of us. Hopeful!
Nate
Just wanted to give everyone a quick update – My life partner and I were legally married in Iowa on June 16, and then had a church ceremony in Becky’s hometown of Rockford, IL on June 19th! So blessed to be married and thankful that Truth Wins Out!
Congrats, Kori! I’m so glad that you’re happy, and I wish you both the very best!
Congratulations Kori, may you have many happy years together.
Here’s another CONGRATULATIONS, Kori. Best wishes to both of you.
G-d does LOVE all people, it is the sin, he cannot be near, for sin will perish in his presence, the only way near him is through His Son Jesus the Messiah.
Praying for you, Jill
Luke 1:79 To shine on those living in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the path of peace.”
Please don’t pray for me jill. It is the height of spiritual arrogance to thinkthat you have the spiritual cachet to do so. Pray for yourself, and when you have achieved a state of sinlessness, then get back to me.
Not to mention– is it a sin not to believe in Jesus? and if so, are you praying the the 2/3 of the world that didn’t get the memo, ordiscarded it as worthless?
Not to mention– what aobut all of those gay Chresitians, ministers, denominations that don’t think the way you do?
Jill, you pray for me and I’ll think for you.
love that, priya. I will steal it.
oopps. commandment # whatever. don’t steal.
OK, I’ll borrow it.
You’re welcome to it Ben, always been one of my favourites.
Captivating blog post you have here. I hadn’t considered such.