The other day, President Obama said the following on The News: “”I don’t sit around just talking to experts because this is a college seminar, we talk to these folks because they potentially have the best answers, so I know whose ass to kick.” It was a candid comment, but it wasn’t vulgar by any stretch of the imagination. Most adult human beings have used that word at some point in the last year, and those who say they haven’t are lying.
But Concerned Women for America are not “most adult human beings.” They are, in fact, getting a bad case of the vapors and possibly in danger of dying from consumption because the President of the United States said “ass.” In fact, one of the Concerned Women, a man named Ken Ervin (presumably the most concerned lady of them all), decided this was a big enough deal that he was going to write a column about it!
Last year, the only butts the president was looking to kick were the unhealthy cigarettes he was chain smoking. But on Monday, his rhetoric changed … and coarsened.
Ellipses are for dramatic effect.
At the same time you’re cheapening the office of President, you’re also using words we’re trying to teach our kids not to use. “But Mom, why can’t I swear? The president does it!”
Ken’s kids call him “Mom”? The gender bending at CWA is more widespread than I knew.
How does your swearing lend “hope” to the nation? What kind of “change” does it bring? I’ll tell you what kind. My young son can now feel completely vindicated in using coarse language and acting like a bully. Why? Because, sir, you did it.
By this logic, Ken’s son should also feel validated in doing the following:
1. Mangling the English language in its entirety.
2. Referring to the Constitution as “just a goddamned piece of paper.”
3. Bombing countries based on false pretenses.
4. Authorizing his underlings to torture prisoners, undermining the moral authority of the United States at home and abroad.
5. Undermining the civil liberties of all Americans to an unprecedented level.
6. Trading Sammy Sosa.
7. Clearing a whole lotta brush.
So, based on those things and the fact that Concerned Strumpet Ken Ervin is raising his young son to emulate presidents, we can safely assume that he’s raising a stupid monster.
Not only did you swear, but you did it in such a manner that the threat behind it wasn’t even veiled.
Scaaaaaary. Wait, what threat? He said he consults experts so that he knows what he’s talking about so he knows whose ass to kick and where to assign responsibility. Big whoop.
Mr. President, perhaps while you’re trying to kick cigarette butts, you should also work on kicking your own crass.
Or maybe Ken Ervin needs to grow up, grow a pair, and stop interjecting while the grown-ups are trying to talk?