GOProud VIP Partygoer 300x210 CPAC Attendees Might Go Home With Unusual Red Bumps This YearHaha, but not for the usual reasons!

Hey, Wonkette, what’s that you say?

The three-legged stool of conservatism is strong and united at CPAC! Yes, as intelligent and alive as a small piece of furniture. However, the stool may not last long, as the hotel they chose, the Marriott Wardham Park, seems to currently be infested with bedbugs. Yes, we knew that, but are there blood-sucking insects there too? Har har har. “I woke up seeing the bed bugs on the bed, on my shirt and even on the bed that I am not using. Unbelievable!!! The hotel staff wasn’t surprised with what happened at all. I will never stay here again,” one visitor wrote recently. Hey, don’t worry about that. That sounds more like Teabaggers than bedbugs.

I hope that doesn’t make things awkward at “the hottest party at CPAC,” being thrown by known liar Andrew Breitbart and the wild and crazy guys of GOProud, featuring Sophie B. Hawkins of A Long Time Ago Semi-Fame, which Gawker described like this:

Ohhh yeah! A nine-to-midnight orgy of fiscal responsibility, fueled by the dulcet tones of an ominsexual Alanis Morissette knockoff. Republican, Democrat, Libertarian or Communist: Gays know how to party!

AND BEDBUGS!

Things are about to get sooooooo awkward, at the CPAC.