When Kathryn Jean Lopez of the National Review looks at Michele and Marcus Bachmann, she sees an all-American, Christian marriage. The rest of us, of course, see an insane dancing lady and a United States Congresswoman who wants to be president. But don’t tell K-Lo that, because she is, well, rather upset that Michele just won’t answer questions about why she hates the gays so much. Michele needs to say more, says K-Lo!
My fantasy version of that conversation would move forward with the interviewee responding early…
Okay, first of all, apologies to all humans everywhere for posting the words “Kathryn Jean Lopez” and “my fantasy” so close to each other. But what she’s talking about here is the little back-and-forth Crazy Eyes had with David Gregory, where she refused to answer questions about her neanderthal views on sexuality. Anywho, this is what K-Lo wishes Michele Bachmann would tell ‘Murka:
“David, people are free to live as they will, but when they insist that apples are oranges and that we must all agree to pretend that’s fact and teach our children that and operate our businesses as if it were true, that is where we have a problem.
“I’ll stand by what I said and I’ll go further: We’re living in a culture that is enslaved. We live in a country where an invented right to privacy is more precious to us than innocent human life.
(blah blah blah, random wingnut crap about abortion, everything is about abortion with this woman…)
“David, there is a reason I’m happy to talk about my marriage and the need for mutual respect and spiritual leadership. Because I’m all too aware of the alternatives.
Life as K-Lo, for instance…
I said what I said about homosexuality, and if I were running to be pastor-in-chief I’d be talking to you about it every day, along with the fact that all too often we have no clear vision of what love truly is.
Got it? Gay couples who have been together for decades? Not experts on love. K-Lo? EXPERT.
We’re never going to have a sensible conversation about same-sex marriage without having a much more fundamental one about marriage itself, about the purpose of sex, and about what love really is.
Uh-huh. Again, K-Lo is the expert on these things, because she knows that everything not officially sanctioned by the Pope is icky. What’s horrifying is that that blacklists consensual, loving, gay marriage and leaves sexual abuse of children by priests as a gray area.
Oy.
This, by the way, isn’t even the first time this year that K-Lo has asked somebody to tell her all about being married. But remember: she is an expert.
She asserts at the end of her piece that Michele Bachmann won’t teach the world about gay marriage because, you know, you all see what happened when Rick Santorum decided to talk sensibly about the issue. [Another marriage hero to Sister K-Lo, I guess.] Mean old gays turned his name into something gross! In that spirit, I’d like to cosign the effort of Tintin at Sadly, No! to redefine the word “Bachmann.”
“We live in a country where an invented right to privacy is more precious to us than innocent human life.”
Yes, in our 15 years (and counting) together, my significant other and I have caused MILLIONS of abortions by … Uh.
Well, I’m not quite sure how our relationship causes abortions, especially since this is a 100% female free arrangement.
Gosh, it’s almost like Sexpert K-Load is completely full of s**t!
Wow, I never knew that my partner and I’s 10 years of being together had that much power to create abortions by the dozen! So I guess that every time I hug and kiss and snuggle with my partner at night, a million babies die! Just makes me want to take a shower after that.(sarcasm implied)
I have never really understood the right’s obession with abortion, particularly the religious right.
I believe that every abortion is a tragedy, regardless of the reason. My girlfriend and I are opposed to having one ourselves, because we would feel guilty about terminating a person’s life in the womb. However, we respect any other person’s right to choose, particularly if they do not have the will or means to raise a child themselves. We are appalled at the belief that the government would “chose” for the woman by making an abortion illegal.
Frankly, there is no unambigious biblical justification for oppositon to abortion. Nevertheless, fundies place unborn fetuses, who cannot think or feel, higher than the lives of Iraqi childfen, who they are happy to bomb into oblivion by supporting the unessary war in Iraq.
There’s a problem here. Someone who cannot see and will not admit that same sex couples love just as deeply and just as devotedly as opposite sex couples is not capable of having a sensible conversation about same sex marriage, let alone about what love “really is.”
No matter how many different ways bigots try to gloss over their prejudices, they keep peeking out from between the words. You could wish more of them were like Orson Scott Card who will say to your face that same-sex couples are just playing house. Someone should tell just Lopez to go ahead and have that sensible conversation with her readers. Nothing is stopping her. She needs to stop being so circumspect and just say flat out that same-sex couples are just faking being in love. They’re just fooling themselves. They’re just playing house.
I’ll say this…reading the comments over there on that Lopez piece is very gratifying. A lot of people got it right away, and are calling her out on her crack about what love really is.
“Invented right to privacy?” Really, Kathryn Jean? Invented? I would like to see the government start probing Kathryn Jean’s privacy and private life and let’s see how long it takes her to become troubled about the “invasion”. Dumb a*s!
Denying marriage to gay couples is hardly people being free to live as they wish.
Attacking this “invented right to privacy” is one of the ways the fundy mcnuggets discredit not only the right to abortion, but also the right to contraception and, most importantly for this group, the right to form loving, familial (and sexual) adult relationships with a member of the same sex. A pity that tarring and feathering has gone out of style, because these people richly deserve it for daring to stick their fat asses into our lives.