But other couples use it to describe themselves. Sometimes even if they are legally married, or have a shy-of-marriage-but-still-legally-recognized relationship.

You have every right to say “Husband, actually” after somebody introduces you as a “partner”, but sometimes people being unsure of which term they’re supposed to use might just not know which term it is you want.

Love you both.

I know how you feel. The look of love in my husband’s eyes after we kiss good-night or upon waking is worth the years I waited to find/marry him.

But simply correcting a gracious host who is trying? In their stead I would not be making any more introductions of you, preferring to let you fend for yourself rather than risk offending your gay sensibilities.

So interjecting “husband” right after gracious host says something else would be so rude that s/he would be justified in not introducing you though s/he would still introduce everyone else? Is that really what you mean?

(yes I am gay and have a partner with whom I have introduction issues!)

Does this mean you have issues with people who introduce you two, or you have issues with your partner about how you’re introduced?

As for introductions, the interesting one in this case is that whenever one of us speaks of the other as her fiancée, it’s often assumed said person is a guy. We’re both femme and pretty passable, and don’t usually trip any “radars,” so I guess that’s understandable. I advocate a polite correction, such as sneaking a “she” in there. On the other hand, she herself often forgets or ignores it, preferring to wait until I can be introduced in person. I guess they both work.

Yes, it is infectious, and I’m so happy for you and your husband. Thanks for sharing.