I will not make the obvious joke, because it is too obvious:

Here is the very long press release from Pastor Steven Andrew’s organization:

Christians Boycott Starbucks — Because Romans 1 Explains Starbucks Hates God
Contact: Pastor Steven Andrew, USA Christian Ministries, 877-537-8734

SAN JOSE, Calif., Jan. 31, 2012 /Christian Newswire/ — What if Starbucks lost 80% of its customers? Christians across the USA are boycotting Starbucks for promoting homosexual ‘marriage’ in Washington State. There is an 80% Christian majority in the USA and 1-2% homosexuals.

Ha, it’s cute when they pretend that “80% Christian majority” is the same thing as “80% of Americans are weird wingnuts like me.” Er, no.

“Christians are upset with Starbucks for turning against God, but we are glad to know that Starbucks doesn’t pretend to be for Christians,” said Pastor Steven Andrew, who is president of USA Christian Ministries. He calls every Christian and church to boycott Starbucks. Leviticus 22:18 says, “You shall not lie with a male as with a woman. It is an abomination.”

“This boycott is important because God blesses those who obey Him and judges those who don’t obey Him (2 Chronicles 19:2),” he adds.

Don’t expect to hear sermons with “grab your Starbucks” or to see Starbucks served at churches. “Starbucks is no longer fashionable. If your church still uses Starbucks, then your pastor is a friend of the world,” he adds. God calls those who oppose Him “haters of God” (Romans 1:30).

It is hoped that Christians will quickly share this boycott with their church.

Starbucks overlooked the health concerns for homosexuals. CDC reports that one in five homosexuals have HIV, with many unaware they are sick. The average homosexual dies at 42 years and has a higher depression rate, Cameron reports.

Cameron is a widely discredited hack who has been kicked out of most professional organizations of which he’s ever been a member. Everyone knows this.

“Jesus loves homosexuals. I wish every person would receive Jesus’ forgiveness for sins by His blood,” pastor Steven Andrew says.

He believes pastors across the USA should speak up. Homosexual ‘laws’ remove Americans’ Christian freedom. “Why is Starbucks against our Founding Father’s and God’s liberty?” he asks. George Washington, John Adams and John Jay made the Christian laws that Starbucks wants to make non-Christian.

Oh goodness, that apostrophe.

In his book “Making A Strong Christian Nation” he explains how George Washington made the law to court martial homosexuals to have God’s blessings. Washington, said, “…the Commander in Chief…with Abhorrence and Detestation of such Infamous Crimes [sodomy]…” See: USA Christian Ministries Founding Fathers Quotes about Homosexuality for more information.

The Christian majority is standing up again. We see Rick Santorum’s rise and surprise Iowa win, the growth of the pro-life movement and bold new pastors.

“Starbucks can follow Satan if they want to. However, pastors are to help Christians. Are you on the Lord’s side? Will you help the USA be blessed by God?” he asks.

Last week, pastor Steven Andrew called the USA to repentance in “God’s State of the Union.”

And that is the video above, and oh my goodness, you go gurl.

[h/t Joe]