In a Nov. 26 press release, ex-gay ministry network Exodus International says it’s “disappointed” and “saddened” that matchmaking company eHarmony is launching a dating site for GLBT singles.

Now, we’ve heard a lot about eHarmony of late: The site founded to serve Christian unmarrieds in 2000 initially discriminated against gays and lesbians seeking mates. Recently, the company announced plans to open CompatiblePartners.net, a companion site that will serve the GLBT community. Some have reacted with glee, while others find eHarmony’s separate-site approach to attracting gay dollars offensive. Still, this is the first time we’ve heard an entity admit to feeling sadness over the matter.

Exodus had wanted the issue surrounding eHarmony’s former no-gays-allowed policy settled by a judge. Two years ago, a gay man filed suit, claiming the company’s old plan violated New Jersey’s anti-discrimination law, which covers sexual orientation. (Exodus, interestingly, felt the need to surround the words “sexual orientation” with quotation marks.) Rather than risk a negative outcome in court, eHarmony decided to found CompatiblePartners.net as a way to settle the legal complaint.

This makes Exodus President Alan Chambers sad.

“Raising a white flag of surrender over foundational Christian principles cannot be an option when we truly believe that such truths are the gateway to freedom and new life,” Chambers said in the release. “The Bible is clear that homosexual relationships were never part of God’s creative design for humanity, nor is it His best plan for individuals. Those of us who have experienced the emptiness of gay life know that promoting it will inevitably lead to more heartache for many.”

What this has to do with the way in which a business chooses to operate escapes us. And what does eHarmony’s outreach to prospective gay and lesbian clients have to do with Exodus’ work? The group leadership says again and again that ex-gay ministries and likeminded reparative therapists exist to help those seeking relief from unwanted same-sex desires. In order to make a profit, eHarmony seeks to serve those looking to act on those desires. How does this threaten the work of Exodus and its hundreds of affiliates?

Chambers should take comfort knowing that eHarmony’s new GLBT-focused site may clear the decks, so to speak, so he can avoid wasting time on happy gays and more easily locate and “save” those not so accepting of their sexuality. And he shouldn’t take the existence of gay men and lesbians being happy and well-adjusted as a cause of misery — that’s just… sad.

eHarmony — a dating service founded by Neil Clark Warren to serve the pre-marital dating desires of conservative evangelicals — has settled an antidiscrimination complaint in New Jersey by setting up a separate-and-unequal dating site for sexual minorities.

Ex-gay industry pundits promptly sought to exploit the news.

Peter LaBarbera accused the gay man who filed the lawsuit of exploiting New Jersey’s “special rights law” — even though the state law equally protects residents regardless of their gender, race, or sexual orientation. LaBarbera further took the opportunity to distort Exodus International officials’ position that sexual attraction is an “identity” that can be changed as easily as one changes one’s political party label or denominational identity:

Evidence that homosexuality is a behavior ‚Äî and not an “identity” ‚Äî issue can be found in the many ex-gays and ex-lesbians who have found freedom from homosexuality through Christ ‚Äî and true love and marriage with a member of the opposite sex.

No one at Exodus has corrected LaBarbera.

Meanwhile, Focus on the Family — whose supporters have, until now, used eHarmony to sanitize their pre-marital sexual desires — sought to project its allies’ questionable morals onto government:

“It’ basically the power of the government being used to force people across the country to accept beliefs that they know are not moral,” said Kelly Shackelford, president of the Free Market Foundation and chief counsel of the Liberty Legal Institute. “It’ an attack on freedom, and people better get ready to fight.”

I have yet to find a gay activist that fully supports the settlement. Personally, I would prefer to know that a company is antigay before I do business with it. I don’t want to be diverted by the company to an afterthought website for second-class citizens — and while I don’t believe businesses should be permitted to harass or fire workers on the basis of a minority status, I’m not sure I really want government to force companies to pretend to be tolerant toward clients when they’re not.

Advocates of equality and freedom will continue to shame eHarmony (and Focus on the Family) for their ongoing opposition to equality and moral consistency. But perhaps gay dating services should begin to wonder whether they might soon be forced to cater to the desires of antigay fundamentalists.

The best course of action may be to support dating services that don’t discriminate in either direction: Services, such as Chemistry.com, that focus on relationship-building and not the gender — or genitals — of their clients.

Hat tips: Good As You, Republic of T