Exodus Wants You to Believe It Has Changed Its Ways and Gone Mainstream.
The Problem Is, It’s Not True.

On November 30, 2011, Ex-Gay Watch writer David Roberts reported that the world’s largest “ex-gay” organization, Exodus International, was on the verge of financial collapse. The crisis was a result of declining ministry attendance, a history of failed “ex-gay” activists, a more LGBT-supportive younger generation, and debt from an ill-advised purchase of a $1.1 million building during the height of the real estate bubble.

To stanch the bleeding, the group’s leaders held an emergency meeting in New York on Nov. 16.  At the clandestine gathering, according to Roberts, Exodus President Alan Chambers (pictured) emphasized making Exodus more “donor accessible” by “re-branding” the organization into “something more palatable to those with funds to give, and the general public alike.”

It appears that Chambers’ first attempt at enacting this new strategy occurred at the Gay Christian Network’s (GCN’s) annual conference in Orlando on Jan. 5-8. In a fascinating panel discussion, Chambers endured scrutiny of his record by former Exodus leaders John Smid (Love in Action), Wendy Gritter (New Directions), and Jeremy Marks (Courage).

During the tense two-hour exchange, Chambers admitted what LGBT advocates who follow these groups have said for years:

“The majority of people I have met, and the majority meaning 99.9% of them, have not experienced a change in their sexual orientation or have gotten to a place where they can say they have never been tempted or are not tempted in some way or experience some level of same-sex attraction.”

This begs the obvious question: Why is Exodus still in business given a 99.9% failure-rate? It seems that embracing Exodus to change one’s sexual orientation makes about as much sense as basing one’s retirement plan on winning the lottery.

In 2006, Chambers brazenly told the San Francisco Chronicle that there are “hundreds of thousands of ex-gays.” Surely, he knew at this time that his heavily advertised programs were not changing people from gay-to-straight, yet Exodus continued collecting money from desperate and vulnerable clients based on these baked numbers, which I believe constitutes consumer fraud.

However, there is a larger and more relevant question facing us today: Was Chambers’ statement at GCN proof that Exodus is turning over a new leaf or was he simply espousing new lies to assist with the cynical “rebranding” efforts dubiously floated in New York?

This key question will be partially answered in Atlanta, where Exodus will hold its Feb. 18 Love Won Out conference. Many eyes will be fixed on this event because it is the first time that Chambers will speak to his base following the GCN panel discussion.

Now that Chambers has admitted that his program is essentially worthless, will he bravely impart this message to the conservative parents who will attend this upcoming conference and desperately want Exodus to provide a “cure” for their child’s homosexuality? Will he risk letting the unvarnished truth upset his political right wing base that pays his salary? Will Chambers purge his program of virulently anti-gay books that portray homosexuality as the work of Satan?

Damning evidence uncovered by Truth Wins Out incontrovertibly proves that Exodus has not altered its message and may be involved in a strategic campaign of subterfuge to trick news reporters and gullible LGBT activists into believing it has moderated its message.

Truth Wins Out’s research reveals that Exodus appears to be engaged in a new two-pronged strategy:

 1)    Alan Chambers is moderating his tone in mainstream media interviews and in interactions with LGBT advocates, while toning down homophobic language on the group’s main website. The hope is to create a façade that will marginalize LGBT advocates that criticize the group’s work. Chambers also hopes to persuade news reporters that Exodus is not stridently anti-gay.

2)    While the unsuspecting or easily duped focus on Chambers’ slick marketing campaign, the same misleading and toxic anti-gay messages historically associated with Exodus will continue unabated below the radar at local Exodus affiliates.

This cynical strategy is very similar to the GOP presidential primaries where Mitt Romney smiled and stayed above the fray in Iowa, while letting his Super PAC bombard Newt Gingrich with negative ads. Because the attacks were not directly from the campaign, it offered Romney a thin veneer of plausible deniability. “Hey, I never said those terrible things about Newt.”

At Exodus, Chambers is smiling and presenting himself as a nice guy who has seen the error of his homophobic ways. Meanwhile his metaphorical Super PAC (the local Exodus affiliates) are engaged in the familiar culture war that destroys the self-esteem and lives of innocent LGBT people, particularly youth.

It is of critical importance that people understand that what Alan Chambers says publicly means essentially nothing unless his words are fully backed by the actions of local Exodus affiliates where the real “pray away the gay” programs occur.

For example, at the GCN discussion, Chambers alleged that media sensationalism is responsible for distorting the image of his organization. He bitterly complained that talk shows falsely describe him as someone who “overcame same-sex attractions…That has to be clarified.”

Such clarification could begin with Chambers who conveniently failed to disclose to the GCN crowd that Exodus lists on its website a ministry affiliate named “Overcomers Outreach Center.” If Chambers does not want the media to claim he “overcame” homosexuality, he should demand that this ministry find a more accurate name that does not deceive clients.

Chambers went on to tell the GCN crowd: “I hate the term ‘ex-gay.’ I don’t use the term ‘ex-gay.’ I hope I don’t lead an ‘ex-gay’ ministry.”

Sadly, Chambers’ remark has little resemblance to reality, with few Exodus affiliates getting the memo. For example, the Christian Collation for Reconciliation proudly boasts on its website that it is, “a member ministry of Exodus-International since 1987, the oldest ex-gay ministry in the state of Texas.”

At GCN, Chambers also vehemently rejected the idea that his organization “prays away the gay.” While Exodus does not use this phrase, it does accurately capture the essence of this organization as objectively judged by the language used by its affiliates. For instance, one flagship ministry, Portland Fellowship, claims, “freedom from homosexuality comes through a person…the Lord Jesus Christ.” The group says it has helped “hundreds of men and women find biblical resolution to their homosexuality.”

Desert Stream Ministries, based in Kansas City, tells clients “the cross is God’s answer to homosexuality.” Exodus can play semantic games all it wants, but reasonable people will conclude that these programs sound an awful lot like “praying away the gay.”

Most disturbing is when Chambers told the GCN gathering: “We’re not here to change you. That is our message. It is something that we have to say. We can’t do that… ‘Change is Possible’ we don’t use that phrase anymore…I’m sorry that that is something that we used.”

One can only conclude by this false statement that Chambers is either malevolent or incompetent. Malevolent in that he is presenting an insincere portrait of Exodus, or breathtakingly incompetent in that he is completely oblivious to what is actually occurring under his nose at Exodus affiliates.

For example, Exodus-affiliate Truth Ministry, based in South Carolina, uses the slogan “Healing from homosexuality through Jesus Christ.” The ministry’s executive director, McKrae Game, has an article posted on the group’s website titled “Is Change Possible?” and a picture of a billboard on the site reads, “I questioned homosexuality. Change is possible. Discover how.”

Another Exodus affiliate, “Carolina New Song” writes on its website that “Our goal is to provide help in achieving an optimum level of healing and change.”

Still another key Exodus-affiliate, Living Hope in Dallas, is still making it appear that the group can “change” people from gay-to-straight. Next to a picture of a good looking man who appears happy, Living Hope tells potential clients: “We believe God has given men a powerful voice to speak truth and life into the world and bring about meaningful change.”

Most revealing is that the bogus message of “change” that Chambers pretends to reject when speaking to an LGBT audience, is occurring in his own backyard. The website of Orlando Exodus-affiliate “Exchange” peddles the message that it offers potential clients “hope for wholeness” and a place where they will be “Finding Freedom From Homosexuality.”

Exchange has an article by Scott Kingry that discusses “leaving homosexuality behind.” In his piece he rhetorically asks, “Can a person change his or her orientation? I believe the answer is yes, but the level of a person’s emotional, physical and spiritual damage might prolong a person’s process. Also, how serious a person’s own motivation is for seeking change may also affect a desired outcome.”

In other words, the Exodus ministry geographically closest to Chambers is peddling the same old “change” myth and then dangerously blaming the victims as unmotivated or too damaged when Exodus’ program inevitably fails.

Obviously, Chambers is either lying or clueless when he portrays the incendiary and misleading “Change is Possible” phrase as a slogan from the past. It is not only widespread as part of present day Exodus rhetoric, but there seems to be no mechanism to curtail its use in future Exodus campaigns at the local level – where the actual programs are instituted. (We showed a few examples of doubletalk, but they were really just the tip of the iceberg)

Sadly, it appears Chambers’ public relations gimmick may pay off. Justin Lee, the Executive Director of GCN, fell for Chambers’ act and said on stage to Chambers, “I hear you and I believe you when I hear you say that this is not a slogan you are using any more.”

Lee should understand that an examination of Exodus’ rhetoric and programs is not about belief but cold, hard facts. When we allow deceptive “ex-gay” activists to con people into thinking that they are mainstream, we do a great disservice to the people we are trying to keep from being victimized. (Note: GCN and Lee did an admirable job with most of the panel and actually did engage Chambers and ask some tough questions.)

Exodus remains a radical, extreme, dangerous, and scientifically bankrupt organization with a toxic message, particularly when it is aimed at youth. At the GNC event Chambers said, “With regards to youth, I think it is a wonderful thing for youth inside the conservative families to have an option through a ministry of Exodus, as long as it is done well. If it isn’t done well, I hope that I will hear about it and we can make these changes.”

As previously demonstrated, Chambers either has no idea about what is going on inside affiliate ministries, or is completely aware and is deliberately concealing the facts. On the GCN panel, John Smid, (pictured) former President of Exodus’ Board, pointedly refuted Chambers’ assertion that Exodus was a healthy environment for youth. (Smid now identifies as gay)

“How many years has Exodus Youth been in ministry? And how many young people today are alienated from their families, their safety, their homes, their parents, their funding, and I never knew that before, because I did not understand it, and wouldn’t receive that. But it is absolutely true, they are.”

This month, Rolling Stone magazine vividly outlined how Exodus’ youth programs can torment students. The article, by Sabrina Rubin Erdely, followed an outbreak of LGBT youth suicides in Minnesota’s Anoka-Hennepin school district (also Michele Bachmann’s congressional district), which has been sued for enacting anti-gay policies. One of the teenagers featured in Rolling Stone, Justin Aaberg, had been harassed by zealous students at an Exodus-sponsored school event just prior to his suicide:

Justin shrugged and smiled, then retreated to his room. It had been a hard day: the annual “Day of Truth” had been held at school, an evangelical event then-sponsored by the anti-gay ministry Exodus International, whose mission is to usher gays back to wholeness and “victory in Christ” by converting them to heterosexuality. Day of Truth has been a font of controversy that has bounced in and out of the courts; its legality was affirmed last March, when a federal appeals court ruled that two Naperville, Illinois, high school students’ Day of Truth T-shirts reading BE HAPPY, NOT GAY were protected by their First Amendment rights. (However, the event, now sponsored by Focus on the Family, has been renamed “Day of Dialogue.”) Local churches had been touting the program, and students had obediently shown up at Anoka High School wearing day of truth T-shirts, preaching in the halls about the sin of homosexuality. Justin wanted to brush them off, but was troubled by their proselytizing. Secretly, he had begun to worry that maybe he was an abomination, like the Bible said.”

…“‘Justin?’ Tammy Aaberg rapped on her son’s locked bedroom door again. It was past noon, and not a peep from inside, unusual for Justin.

‘Justin?’ She could hear her own voice rising as she pounded harder, suddenly overtaken by a wild terror she couldn’t name. ‘Justin!’ she yelled. Tammy grabbed a screwdriver and loosened the doorknob. She pushed open the door. He was wearing his Anoka High School sweatpants and an old soccer shirt. His feet were dangling off the ground. Justin was hanging from the frame of his futon, which he’d taken out from under his mattress and stood upright in the corner of his room. Screaming, Tammy ran to hold him and recoiled at his cold skin. His limp body was grotesquely bloated – her baby – eyes closed, head lolling to the right, a dried smear of saliva trailing from the corner of his mouth. His cheeks were strafed with scratch marks, as though in his final moments he’d tried to claw his noose loose. He’d cinched the woven belt so tight that the mortician would have a hard time masking the imprint it left in the flesh above Justin’s collar.

Still screaming, Tammy ran to call 911. She didn’t notice the cellphone on the floor below Justin’s feet, containing his last words, a text in the wee hours:

:-( he had typed to a girlfriend.

What’s wrong

Nothing

I can come over

No I’m fine

Are you sure you’ll be ok

No it’s ok I’ll be fine, I promise

In defending his dangerous youth program and excusing the continued use of reckless terminology, Chambers disingenuously pretends he has little power over Exodus affiliates, even though he tries to project an aura of power as the group’s president.

 “You can’t imagine how difficult it is to steer a ship like Exodus, the size of Exodus with regards to these type of issues…it is difficult and I have been very careful not to confuse a large constituency of people too quickly with terminology changes.”

Of course, we all know this excuse is patently absurd. In a single e-mail, Chambers can instruct all affiliates to stop outright saying or manipulating language to imply that “change is possible.” In the same communication, Chambers can demand an immediate cessation of all work relating to Exodus Youth. Furthermore, he can warn that all ministries that do not comply with his dictate will lose their official status as an affiliate. It is beyond laughable for Chambers to pretend that he has no say in such matters and is little more than a helpless bystander to enacting changes within his own organization.

The upcoming Love Won Out seminar in Atlanta is Chambers’ first opportunity to show that he has the integrity to tell a conservative Christian audience exactly what he told GCN: Exodus’ programs don’t work.

If Chambers delivers the same, tired, anti-gay message espoused at previous conferences, he will be permanently viewed as a two-faced charlatan. Only through a radical departure from the past, an entirely new message, and a demand of total compliance by Exodus affiliates, will Chambers’ reality finally begin to match his rhetoric.

The world is waiting for real repentance, not the rebranding of a failed product. Atlanta could signify a new beginning for Exodus, or the absolute end of people ever again believing a word Alan Chambers has to say. This may be his last opportunity to show that “Change is Possible” for Exodus International.

_______________________________________

Fight back against Exodus’ lies in Atlanta:

‘Love Won Out’ community meeting
Thursday, Feb. 16, 7:30 p.m.
Lutheran Church of the Redeemer
731 Peachtree St., Atlanta, GA 30308

Protest
Saturday, Feb. 18, 10 a.m. – 1 p.m.
Midway Church
3915 Carrollton-Villa Rica Highway
Villa Rica, GA 30180
www.facebook.com/QJL.Atlanta

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Contact: Wayne Besen, Executive Director
Phone: 917-691-5118
E-Mail: wbesen@truthwinsout.org

TWO Demands ‘Ex-Gay’ Group Apologize For Defamatory Remarks Within Five Days Or Face Legal Action

PFOX President Greg Quinlan’s Fabricated Tale Claiming TWO Tried to Have Him Murdered is Unconscionable and Unacceptable, Says TWO

Burlington, Vt. – Truth Wins Out sent a letter to Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays today sternly warning PFOX that it would face legal consequences if it did not publicly apologize within five days for defaming TWO Executive Director Wayne Besen. The letter from Virginia attorney Michael Hamar outlined four concrete demands that PFOX would have to satisfy to avoid having the matter settled in a court of law.

On October 7, 2011 Quinlan was interviewed on News-Plus with Mark Segraves (WDCW-TV). At the 10:38 mark of the show, Quinlan (pictured) fabricates an alleged hit on his life. According to Quinlan:

“Truth Wins Out if you look further, including Wayne Besen. He’s asked for people, you know, somebody needs to run Greg over. He needs to be hit with a bus. Somebody should inject him with AIDS. Those are the things that Wayne Besen and Truth Wins Out says about me. That’s pretty hateful rhetoric.”

“Greg Quinlan deliberately and maliciously fabricated a story with the sole purpose of smearing Truth Wins Out and damaging my reputation,” said Truth Wins Out Executive Director Wayne Besen. “These defamatory actions are unconscionable, unacceptable, and I refuse to let these vicious lies go unanswered.”

Hamar sent his letter to PFOX outlining the necessary steps to ameliorate the situation:

1. A written retraction be issued by Gregory Quinlan on PFOX letterhead admitting he fabricated the incident(s) and made untrue statements during the television interview. The retraction must be signed by PFOX’s Executive Director Regina Griggs and Mr. Quinlan.

2. A YouTube video of Mr. Quinlan apologizing for the false and defamatory statements.

3. Mr. Quinlan will offer to immediately make an apology on the very television show in which the defamatory statements about Mr. Besen were made.

4. PFOX will send out a press release, first approved by Mr. Besen, announcing the apology.

“These terms must be accepted within five business days of receipt of this letter,” wrote TWO attorney Michael Hamar. “Should Mr. Quinlan and PFOX refuse to accept these terms, Mr. Besen will have no alternative other than to seek relief in court and in the process of the litigation subject Mr. Quinlan and/or PFOX to depositions, interrogatories and other discovery processes.”

The veracity of PFOX has long been questioned. Its former president, Richard Cohen, was expelled for life from the American Counseling Association for multiple ethics violations. A key member of the organization’s Speaker’s Bureau, Arthur Abba Goldberg, is a convicted felon sent to prison for financial fraud. In 2010, Quinlan attended a conference organized by Americans for Truth About Homosexuality, a group that is listed as a certified Southern Poverty Law Center hate group. During his speech at the meeting, Quinlan disparaged LGBT people and said that when he used to live as an openly gay man he wasn’t a “flaming faggot.”

“I wasn’t your flaming faggot, you know,” Quinlan told the chuckling crowd. “I can say that because I’ve been there and done that. You know, the one’s whose wrists are so limp that when the wind blows they slap themselves in the face. I wasn’t one of them.”

Read TWO’s full letter to PFOX.

HELP TWO FIGHT BACK

Please consider a tax-deductible contribution to Truth Wins Out today to help us fight this critical legal battle with PFOX. If we don’t stand up to such blatant lies, we are giving our opponents a green light to smear the entire LGBT community.

It is critical that we finally push back and say “ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!” If we won’t fight back when they accuse us of attempted murder — when will we? The time to take a stand against these dishonest bullies is NOW!

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Contact: Wayne Besen, Executive Director
Phone: 917-691-5118
E-Mail: wbesen@truthwinsout.org

Greg Quinlan’s Defamatory Claims Are a Complete Fabrication and a Brazen Attempt to Smear LGBT Organization, Says TWO

Burlington, Vt. – Truth Wins Out reacted with outrage and disgust today to a television interview with Greg Quinlan, President of Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays (PFOX), who falsely claimed that TWO Executive Director, Wayne Besen, put a hit out on his life. Quinlan is also a lobbyist for the New Jersey Family Policy Council.

On October 7, 2011 Quinlan was interviewed on News-Plus with Mark Segraves (WDCW-TV). The comments, first noticed by Ex-Gay Watch, came to TWO’s attention on Tuesday.

Throughout the show, Quinlan distorts reality and flat out dissembles on several subjects. However, at the 10:38 mark he fabricates an alleged hit on his life. According to Quinlan:

“Truth Wins Out if you look further, including Wayne Besen. He’s asked for people, you know, somebody needs to run Greg over. He needs to be hit with a bus. Somebody should inject him with AIDS. Those are the things that Wayne Besen and Truth Wins Out says about me. That’s pretty hateful rhetoric.”

“The bizarre and defamatory scenario portrayed by Quinlan exists only in his own mind,” said Wayne Besen, Executive Director of Truth Wins Out. “What he said is entirely fabricated and a dishonest and brazen attempt to smear me personally, destroy my reputation, and discredit the good work of Truth Wins Out.”

The integrity of PFOX has long been questioned. Its former president, Richard Cohen, was expelled for life from the American Counseling Association for multiple ethics violations. A key member of the organization’s Speaker’s Bureau, Arthur Abba Goldberg, is a convicted felon sent to prison for financial fraud. In 2010, Quinlan attended a conference organized by Americans for Truth About Homosexuality, a group that is listed as a certified Southern Poverty Law Center hate group. During his speech at the meeting, Quinlan disparaged LGBT people and said that when he used to live as an openly gay man he wasn’t a “flaming faggot.”

“I wasn’t your flaming faggot, you know,” Quinlan told the chuckling crowd. “I can say that because I’ve been there and done that. You know, the one’s whose wrists are so limp that when the wind blows they slap themselves in the face. I wasn’t one of them.”

“It speaks to Quinlan’s character that he lies so easily and simply makes things up,” said TWO’s Besen. “I’d be willing to take a lie detector test to prove my innocence and to show that I’ve never said such vile words. Will Quinlan also take these tests to prove the ‘veracity’ of his calumny? Truth Wins Out is also exploring legal options at this time.”

Truth Wins Out is a nonprofit organization that fights anti-LGBT extremism. TWO specializes in turning information into action by organizing, advocating and fighting for LGBT equality.

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On March 8, 2011, the Oprah Winfrey Network (OWN) aired an episode of the series Our America with Lisa Ling entitled “Pray the Gay Away?” The show purported to explore the question of whether or not one can be gay and Christian at the same time, and asked whether it was possible to go from gay to straight by joining an “ex-gay” program.

Instead of an honest, hard-hitting look at Exodus International, the primary proponent of ‘pray-away-the-gay’ quackery, Lisa Ling’s viewers were treated to a puff piece that cast Exodus and its president, self-styled “ex-gay” activist Alan Chambers, in a very sympathetic light. Ling allowed Chambers and others to put forth factual inaccuracies, misrepresentations of the truth, and even outright lies without once holding them accountable to the facts: so-called “ex-gay” programs do not work and harm their clients.

Lisa Ling’s sins of omission were equally grievous. For example, she never mentioned Exodus’ notorious anti-gay lobbying efforts or the fact that Exodus endorses “therapy” that has been denounced by every major medical professional organization in America. Exodus embraces the use of “spiritual warfare,” also known as exorcism.

In short, rather than doing her journalistic duty to uncover the facts, ask the tough questions, and sort through the spin to find the truth, Lisa Ling allowed herself to be duped by Alan Chambers. The result was a kind and gentle (but utterly fictitious) portrait of Exodus that essentially functioned as an infomercial for that organization.

Here at Truth Wins Out, we know all too well the dangers posed by Exodus International and other organizations that falsely promise to ‘pray away the gay.’ These organizations are wolves in sheep’s clothing whose harmful message leaves victims with scars that last a lifetime and, all too often, drives them to attempt suicide.

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Lisa Ling was duped by Exodus President Alan Chambers and failed to ask him key follow-up questions.

This was particularly glaring when it came to Chambers spinning what really went on sexually between he and his wife when they first married.

On Ling’s  “Pray the Gay Away” segment on the Oprah Winfrey Network, Chambers portrays his marriage as true bliss. He tells the “reporter”, “It (sex with a woman) felt natural, absolutely, and has every day for our entire marriage.”

What? You’ve got to be kidding me.

Chambers admitted at a 2007  Love Won Out conference in Phoenix, “I realize that I do live a life of denial. Not denial of who I used to be, not denial of who I could be today, but I deny what comes naturally to me.”

Why didn’t Ling ask Chambers, “If your experience with your wife was so natural, then why are you saying that you deny what comes naturally to you?”

It also took Chambers nine months to consummate his marriage, hardly a ringing endorsement of his heterosexuality. Yet, Ling never pointed this out to her audience.

Basically, Alan Chambers lied through his teeth, spun the truth, inverted reality — and Lisa Ling and OWN enabled this charade. If the reporter would have done her homework, she would have known about Chambers’ honeymoon horror.

Shame on Ling for not doing her job and telling the real story. Shame on the Oprah Winfrey Network for allowing this shallow puff piece to air.

Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays (PFOX) Board member and NARTH follower Christopher Doyle had this to say in a letter to The Washington Post:

Putting ‘ex-gay’ in quotes suggested that such a sexual orientation is not valid, not recognized or both. But thousands of former homosexuals collectively identify themselves as such. The D.C. Superior Court ruled in 2009 that ex-gays are a protected sexual orientation class in the District. Not all persons who experience same-sex attractions choose to live gay lives. Many of us have voluntarily left a homosexual life through therapeutic work or behavioral choice. I did, and I have been happily married to a woman for nearly five years; we have two children. I no longer experience same-sex attraction and have no desire to return to the homosexual life. Please respect this choice.” – Christopher Doyle, board member of Parents & Friends Of “Ex-Gays” (PFOX), in a letter to the Washington Post.

Doyle has an issue with so-called “ex-gays” not being recognized by the LGBT community. Yet, the cynical Doyle belongs to NARTH, where the group’s co-founder Dr. Joseph Nicolosi preaches, “There is no such thing as a homosexual, just heterosexuals with a homosexual problem.”

So, Doyle wants to be respected and acknowledged as a so-called “ex-gay” without the dreaded quotation marks — but the group he represents denies the very existence of LGBT people. Doyle’s dishonest double-standard is quite obvious and it is clear that he has an agenda to falsely present himself as a victim. Instead, of course, he is a victimizer that pretends the lives of millions of people are make believe and can be “fixed” by quack therapy and prayer.

Why do we put quotation marks around the word “ex-gay”?

Maybe it is because such activists admit, when pressed, that they have simply changed their behavior, not their sexual orientation.  Perhaps, the constant scandals and outings of activists who claimed to be “ex-gay”, but weren’t living as advertised, affects the decision to use quotation marks. And how about the inconvenient fact that every respected medical and mental health association in America says there is NO EVIDENCE supporting the efficacy of reparative therapy, while there is evidence that shows attempts to change can be harmful? There is also the growing body of research that increasingly shows biological components to sexual orientation. Of course, there are many victims of these programs who are speaking out, as well as spouses that were harmed by such unwise marriages to alleged, purported, so-called “ex-gays”.

Frauds like Doyle claim there are “thousands of former homosexuals” — but from what source does he get this statistic? Groups such as Exodus, PFOX and NARTH purposely do not keep statistics — because they are acutely aware the truth about their failure rate would have put them out of business decades ago.  Interestingly, for all of their bravado, “ex-gay” activists refuse to take physical tests, such as the No Lie MRI, to prove they have changed their attractions. If they want the quote marks removed, why not take such tests? Maybe it is because telling tales for anti-gay political organizations pays better than telling the truth or a real job?

Finally, if there are thousands or tens of thousands of such people — where are they? It seems the only people who claim that they have prayed away the gay are professional, paid political activists with books and seminars to sell. Where is the “ex-gay” March on Washington to show the masses of “ex-gays” that allegedly exist?

If hucksters like Doyle want the quote marks removed, they should begin by acknowledging the existence of LGBT people who cannot change. He should also put his money where is mouth is and prove that such people truly exist outside the staffs of homophobic political organizations and avaricious therapists profiting from unnecessary pain.

No Lie MRI, Mr. Doyle? Polygraph? Penile  plethysmograph?

Until such physical proof is provided — all I can say is:

“”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”EX-GAY”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”"”

Op-ed by Patrick McAlvey

As a survivor of “ex-gay” therapy, I was mortified to learn that Exodus International is shifting its focus in 2011 to children and teens. These are the people most vulnerable and defenseless to Exodus’ attacks on healthy development and psychological well-being.

As I first became aware of my sexual orientation at the age of 12, I was drawn into the web of Mike Jones, one of Exodus International’s unlicensed, unqualified, untrained, unregulated, and unsupervised counselors.  For the next 10 years, a man who had no business counseling anyone, and who certainly should not have had access to children, set the tone for how I viewed my orientation and myself as a person.

Jones passed on to me the “facts” that my attractions were sinful, that no gay person was happy, and that every gay person was addicted to drugs, alcohol and random sexual encounters.  I lived in a homogeneous religious world, didn’t know any LGBT people and had no reason to believe otherwise. I fully believed Mike Jones for years. He assured me that my sexual orientation could and should change, leading me to suffer through years of shame and self-hatred when no such change occurred.

Later, when I was 19, he subjected me to prolonged hugs and even “holding therapy”, where I was instructed to lay in his arms for a solid hour to “feel the strength of another man”.  He asked me inappropriate questions about my genitals and suggested I use handyman tools to become more masculine.

Last year, Jones was largely discredited – his board of directors dissolved, many local churches ceased supporting his work, and he was removed as an “approved outreach group” with the Michigan Department of Corrections.  But the entire time he was victimizing me, Exodus International supported Jones’ work and continued to refer people to his “ex-gay” operation.

This week, Exodus International unveiled its plan to put targets on the backs of thousands of innocent children around the country, many who already sit in pews each Sunday feeling scared and alone.  The “ex-gay” group plans to utilize social media, YouTube videos, booklets, an IPhone App, and a re-branding to make sure every one of these kids hates a part of themselves and believes their orientation is perverse and an abomination.

The reality is their orientation is a natural and beautiful part of who they are.  Exodus International has proven they are content to sacrifice children’s identities, happiness, self-confidence and mental health, to further their lies and messages of intolerance.

I know because I experienced the Exodus International nightmare firsthand.

What is particularly insidious about Exodus’ ministry is that it hides behind the fallacy that it desires helping only those who face what they cynically call “unwanted same-sex attraction”.

The reality is the “ex-gay” industry works day and night to create cultures in families, churches, communities and governments when possible, where folks who are not heterosexual are left ostracized, alone, judged and condemned.  When the lies spread by Exodus International and the “ex-gay” industry lead people to believe change is possible and necessary for God, their church or their family to love them, naturally their attractions become “unwanted”.

Thankfully, there is a happy ending to my story.  I escaped the destructive lies of the “ex-gay” industry and with time, good friends, and therapy, came to love and accept myself the way I am.  I have been an out and proud gay man for almost 5 years and have found healing through sharing my story and connecting with other survivors of the “ex-gay” industry.

But my heart breaks imagining other children naively falling for the same lies that ruled my life all those years.  Children deserve to be loved and supported for who they are. Their young, fragile self-esteems deserve to be protected and their identities nurtured.

It is my sincere hope that more and more families and churches will see the real danger Exodus International represents and choose to distance themselves and their children from Exodus’ materials, counselors and programs.

Before the organization does enormous harm, it should abandon its disturbing plan to target children and teenagers in 2011.

Last week, I commented on how the “ex-gay” group Exodus International had a sluggish year where, at times, it seemed as they had dropped off the radar. It turns out that Exodus had gone into hibernation since the summer to ask God for direction. According to a new letter written to Exodus supporters from Executive Director Alan Chambers:

As is the case every year about this time, my team and I are gearing up for a new year!  We have been in meetings regularly since August praying and talking about how and where God is leading Exodus International in 2011 and beyond. Some years we roll out big new endeavors and introduce big ideas that God has given us.  This year, however, God isn’t calling us to do anything new.

God’s call to do nothing sat well with me, considering Exodus was already losing relevance. Unfortunately, I continued reading and was was alarmed that Exodus’ top goal in 2011 is to recruit school children as young as eleven years old (Middle School age). The organization plans to lure these children by investing in high-tech gadgets and new media. According to the online letter:

…the greatest area of need in our culture is outreach to young people.  We will be changing the name of Exodus Youth to Exodus Student Ministries in order to encompass middle school thru [sic] college age students.

We have listened to youth pastors, parents and especially students and we want to amplify our message in a way that they will best receive it: via web communication, YouTube, podcasts and short to the point booklets. We are also in the process of creating an App for iPhone users.

Given the organization’s appalling record with youth, this organization has no business in schools or around anyone under the age of 21. Their message is hateful, intolerant, scientifically bankrupt and may lead to teens harming themselves — including the potential for depression, drug abuse and even suicide.

Disconcertingly, many of Exodus’ “counselors” have virtually no professional training and the organization does not employ rigorous standards when they pair up vulnerable youth with adults. The results of Exodus’ lack of professionalism has, at times, been devastating.

The so-called “ex-gay” organization has forced youth, against their will, into its programs. The most notable example is Zach Stark, a 16-year-old Tennessee boy, who in 2005 was forced into Exodus’ “Refuge” boot camp, run by member ministry Love In Action. Zach Stark made international news when he posted his predicament on MySpace:

Somewhat recently, as many of you know, I told my parents I was gay… Well today, my mother, father, and I had a very long “talk” in my room where they let me know I am to apply for a fundamentalist christian program for gays. They tell me that there is something psychologically wrong with me, and they “raised me wrong.” I’m a big screw up to them, who isn’t on the path God wants me to be on. So I’m sitting here in tears, joing the rest of those kids who complain about their parents on blogs – and I can’t help it.

The uproar over the incident prompted Exodus into closing down the notorious Refuge program. Similarly, on October 6, 2010, Exodus shuttered its noxious Day of Truth program which mocked the Day of Silence, an annual event where students take a vow of silence in support of LGBT friends who are bullied.

Exodus took this extraordinary step following a high profile string of suicides, tacitly admitting that its program exacerbated homophobia and bullying in schools.

“Even though we have reached a fair number of students”, said Chambers, “We believe that due to the timing of the event, Day of Truth was always perceived in an adversarial manner, and became more about policy than people.

One of the more disturbing aspects of Exodus is the tendency to place youth in programs alongside sexual reprobates. On the March 15, 2007 the Montel Williams Show featured former Exodus client Lance Carroll who spoke out about his harrowing experience with Exodus:

“I went to one of your organizations,” said Carroll, who was speaking directly to Exodus’ Alan Chambers. “I was in a group with a convicted sexual offender.” (See video 1:10 mark)

Lance Carroll is not alone. Exodus clearly has an ongoing predator problem that it must seriously address before it makes brainwashing youth its foremost priority in 2011.

Patrick McAlvey was also an Exodus client at the age of 19. He visited Exodus’ Lansing affiliate Corduroy Stone where he was counseled by Mike Jones. During counseling, McAlvey was asked about the size of his member and made to engage in erotic cuddling. He spoke out about the experience in a Truth Wins Out video:

‘Ex-gay’ survivor Jaylen Braiden was taken advantage of by an Exodus team leader at Desert Stream Ministries [DSM]. This counselor later got in trouble for sexually abusing other minors. Exodus’ Alan Chambers has yet to come clean and publicly discuss the Desert Stream Ministries scandal.

However, on March 8, 2010 Desert Stream founder Comiskey wrote a blog post entitled “Falling Mercies” where he says DSM had been, “cast out of our home church”, Vineyard Anaheim, as a result of “a darker strain of sin in our own ranks.” He goes onto reveal that this sin was, “a longstanding staff person from Desert Stream had sexually abused at least one teenager who had sought help from us.”

Aside from the very real prospect of youth being placed with unsavory characters who appear to be unmonitored and unfiltered, the message of Exodus is destructive. The organization tells youth that they are sexually broken, sinful, counterfeit, satanic or perverse.

Spiritual warfare is a common part of Exodus’ rhetoric.

In a 2005 Exodus Newsletter Chambers said:

“One of the many evils this world has to offer is the sin of homosexuality. Satan, the enemy, is using people to further his agenda to destroy the Kingdom of God and as many souls as he can.”

At the “Family Impact Summit,” a right wing conference in Brandon, Florida held on Sept. 21, 2007, Chambers told the crowd of social conservatives:

“We have to stand up against an evil agenda. It is an evil agenda and it will take anyone captive that is willing, or that is standing idly by.”

To lure youths, Exodus resorts to outright lying about LGBT life. For example, Chambers says that that gay life is only for the young:

Chambers also misleads by falsely claiming that gay life will disappoint.

Given the recent uptick in gay suicides and understanding that hate leads to bullying in schools, it is grossly irresponsible for Exodus, given its reprehensible record — to target youth. Before parents hand their children over to this organization or get them an i-phone application, they should know the whole truth about this notorious organization.

(Weekly Column)

Earlier this week, Boyd K. Packer, president of the Mormon Church’s Quorum of Twelve Apostles, gave a sermon that endorsed discrimination against gay people and claimed that they could be converted into heterosexuals.

Conveniently, Packer failed to point out that the keynote speaker at the Mormon “ex-gay” group Evergreen’s September conference was John Paulk – the supposedly cured family man that I photographed in a Washington, DC gay bar in 2000. (video below)

Truth Wins Out recently revealed that Mormon “life coach”, Alan Downing, was instructing clients to touch their genitals in front of a mirror to help make them straight. (video below) And “People Can Change”, a bizarre boot camp run by Rich Wyler, a Mormon “ex-gay” activist, has a “cuddle room” where men touch each other to find sexual “healing”.

No matter how many millions of dollars religious organizations squander on this fatal fantasy, or how loudly they preach this destructive lie – there is no evidence that one can pray away the gay.  The idea that millions of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people will abandon rich, satisfying lives to become “ex-gay” is equal parts propaganda and pipedream.

Given the fact that LGBT people exist and are not going anywhere, the Religious Right has two choices:

1) It can accept that LGBT people are on a trajectory to be embraced by mainstream society

2) Or, it can suppress this rapidly growing trend through intimidation and violence

In the past year, I believe, the LGBT movement has reached a tipping point, where there is finally light at the end of the tunnel. Polls are in favor of equal rights and widespread acceptance is seeping into nearly every sphere of society.

Anti-gay activists see the writing on the wall and are reacting rabidly by spewing unprecedented amounts of biblical bile. The attitude of these extremists can be summed up by The Call’s Lou Engle, who said at an anti-gay seminar in Lynchburg, Va., earlier this year, that without a Godly intercession, the LGBT movement would win.

Of course, there will be no Godly intercession, anymore than there will ever be a mass exodus into the silly “ex-gay” ministries. And, this is precisely why organizations like Focus on the Family, The Minnesota Family Council, and Exodus International fight tooth and nail against programs that would stop anti-gay bullying.

The horrible truth is that the Religious Right needs the threat of violence and selective use of terror to keep young people from living openly and honestly. They even have entire websites, such as TrueTolerance.org, and annual events, like the “Day of Truth”, to ensure bullying remains a bloody right of passage for many gay students.

Indeed, Focus on the Family’s True Tolerance website smarmily states, “Concerned about homosexual advocacy in your child’s school? You’ve come to the right place.”

Our foes would deny that violence is their intention, and no doubt many of them would prefer a neat and clean conversion, before a messy reversion to brute force. But, Dr. Joseph Berger revealed how the right genuinely believes gender norms should be enforced.

“…let the other children ridicule the (gay or transgender) child who has lost that clear boundary between play-acting at home and the reality needs of the outside world,” wrote Berger, a “Scientific” Advisory Committee member of the “ex-gay” therapy group NARTH. “Maybe, in this way, the child will re-establish that necessary boundary.”

How do such “academic” ideas play out in the real world?

Ask 11-year old Tyler Wilson, a victim of such boundary enforcement. Last month bullies broke his arm because he joined his school’s cheering team. Also last month, at least six gay youth committed suicide, by way of bridge jumping, hanging, and gunshot wound. (Finally – through suicide — the Religious Right can claim success for helping gay youth “leave homosexuality”.)

The closet is also enforced for adults by roaming thugs who use violence to let LGBT people know their place. In the heavily gay neighborhood of Chelsea, a group of friends were attacked this weekend with fists and a metal garbage can, while the assailants yelled, “Go home faggots. This is our neighborhood.”

Actually, this is my neighborhood, with my apartment only one block away from where this gay bashing incident occurred.

I have also had drinks at the historic Stonewall Inn – birthplace of the modern LGBT movement and the scene of an equally horrific anti-gay hate crime this past weekend.

On a street corner where I have held hands with my partner, I now must look over my shoulder. In a bar where I once imbibed carefree, I must now be on guard. Even if the perpetrators are caught and jailed, the damage to all LGBT people is done.

Breeding such insecurity, at root, is why the Religious Right vehemently opposes efforts in schools to stop bullying. As long as no place feels completely safe, the church-inspired closet will maintain the illusion of a safe haven.

The unholy marriage of the bully and the pulpit really is all anti-gay activists have left in their arsenal to defeat the LGBT movement. No matter how many youth commit suicide or adults are gay-bashed, don’t expect our foes to give up their trump card of violence anytime soon.