Hark!, for heterosexual male college students have begun writing editorials explaining The Gayness to us, so that we may all read and learn!
A student at the University of Alabama named Michael Patrick took to his school’s paper to explain that the gay teen suicides of the past several weeks are very tragic, yes, but part of the blame should be assigned to older gay people for being so damned gay. I’m not kidding:
I agree that FOX News personalities and right-wing politicians spewing anti-gay rhetoric have blood on their hands, but the blame does not stop there.
Older gay men and women are also in many ways responsible for the anti-gay atmosphere that has led teens to kill themselves over their own sexuality.
The gay culture has been aggressively pushing a counter-heteronormative agenda that demonizes anything that would typically be considered heterosexual. Many homosexuals take on a flamboyant lifestyle filled with drug use and promiscuous sex, and the media helps perpetuate the idea that this is the normal lifestyle of all gay men and women.
Uh, Michael, no. I agree that stereotyping is a problem, but the fact that you may have seen a pride parade on the teevee does not make you an expert on gay culture, first of all. I’ve been out of the closet for quite a while, and I don’t see any “demonization” of “heterosexual” things. I see a culture that encourages people to embrace who they are. The fact is that some gay men are more flamboyant. Others aren’t.
I’m not asking gay men and women to begin marching in suits and ties, but these types of demonstrations are doing nothing more than highlighting the differences in gay and straight culture. Homosexuals need to begin stressing the similarities between gay and straight.
You see, if gays just acted exactly like straight people, we’d never have these problems! Here’s the thing: straight people have debauched parades and celebrations, too. Anyone heard of Cancun on Spring Break?
Older gay men and women should spend less time attacking blatantly homophobic figureheads, because they pose less of a threat to gay teens than these silent homophobes perpetuating the notion that a person cannot be gay and normal.
For instance, gay adults should avert their attacks from men like Pat Robertson, who has equated homosexuality to “having sex with ducks” and pedophilia, to people like Perez Hilton and Adam Lambert, who reinforce the idea that you must be gay or normal and that being both is not a realistic option.
Thank you, heterosexual male Southern writer, for man-splaining to everybody exactly how gays should be. We bow to your expertise and will consult you in the future before we make any decisions.
Gays in America need to make a culture adjustment; otherwise the next time a homosexual teen commits suicide, they might be holding the rope.
Screw you.
And kids, just be who you are. Straight people don’t all fit the same “mold” either.
Okay, the next editorial is probably even more offensive, because it was written by some straight male writer at RUTGERS, which complains that, you know, Rutgers isn’t able to properly mourn the loss of Tyler Clementi, because the media won’t go away, blah blah blah, why is this about “gays,” blah blah blah:
The death of University student Tyler Clementi might have been properly mourned if it were not for the massive rallies and aggressive news coverage that altered the nature of the situation. The truth is that an 18-year-old boy killed himself – he was a student just like the rest of us, someone just trying to receive an education. Yet people’s relentless agendas took his death and turned it into a cause based on false pretenses.
A crowd of more than 20 people ended up lying outside the entrance of the Rutgers Student Center on the College Avenue campus the first night of the news breaking. The chants were, “We’re here. We’re queer. We want safety in our homes.” The mistake was that Clementi’s death should not have been turned into a lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender protest for gay rights and safe spaces at the University. Robert O’Brien, Department of Anthropology assistant instructor, led the rally as he chanted, “Not safe in dorms, not safe at Rutgers.” Essentially, an angry mob fending for their rights turned the death of a young boy into a cause for “safe spaces” for gays across the University – all the while, these spaces already existed. We have groups across campus that deal with students’ psychological difficulties – 17 Seconds is one that deals with suicides – as well as groups that address their sexual orientation. We have these spaces, and the University community is diverse enough to provide students with whatever it is they need.
The focal point of Clementi’s tragic death should have been a boy’s inability to deal with the hardships of life. And yet the news and certain organizations picked this up and carried it into the ranks of general causes for major social groups – for their profit. Did Tyler really feel unsafe after all? Do we know the reason behind his suicide? Do we know if he, himself, would take part in the movement behind his death – the push for safe spaces?
It is disappointing that everyone from news to celebrities picked up the story. Actress Brittany Snow and actor Neil Patrick-Harris are just two of the many celebrities belittling Clementi’s death – forcing his remembrance into a cause rather than a proper mourning.
We did not know Tyler.
Obviously.
Turning his death into a push for gay rights is a fallacy. Homosexuality is not the only reason for which people kill themselves. In this case, it might have pushed Clementi over the edge, but the fact that he was gay should by no means turn his death into a march for safe spaces.
Yeah, heaven forfend a heartbreaking, tragic situation involving a young gay student who was so scared of being outed that he jumped off a freaking bridge lead to a more honest discussion about how to make things better for young gay students. It’s just offensive, isn’t it, Rutgers Heterosexual Male who did not know Tyler Clementi?
What Republican man-child doesn’t get is that had Tyler been straight, had he been filmed having sex with a girl, and had that film made its way online, he might have been freaked, he might have even still committed suicide – maybe. But the chances are much greater of all that happening when the victim is gay.
When you’re straight and the boys in college see a vid of you screwing a girl, you’re the BMOC. When you’re a fag and it happens, the entire school mocks you, points at you, and laughs. It’s just not funny when a guy f-cks a girl. It’s funny as hell when a dude does it to another dude and the entire world gets to watch, and laugh.
And what about your parents? Has GOP man-child come out to his parents as straight? How about to his aunts and uncles, to his cousins, to his childhood friends, to the people on his floor, to the lady at the front desk of his dorm, and to the guy he buys his coffee from on the way to class (let alone every single stranger he sees on his way to class)? I’m gonna go out on a limb here and suggest that after having been filmed having sex, straight kids don’t need to worry about coming out as “straight” to every single human being they’re going to see for the next few months, if not years. Gay kids do. And while straight kids won’t be berated, beaten up, killed, and disowned for being straight – gay kids will.
Exactly.
So anyway, please, more straight men man-splaining gayness and gay suicide, because we still have an awful lot to learn, we do!
In an obscene turn of events reserved for pasquinade the dear Minister of Arts and Culture (residing in the Ministry of Intolerance and Prejudice), Lulu Xingwana, stormed out of an art exhibition held on Constitution Hill. The dear Minister was so indignant that she called the artworks “… immoral, offensive and going against nation-building.”
Now that’ pretty rich coming from an obvious plebeian only in official title by virtue of bestowment by the Moral Compass of South Africa, Jacob Zuma, and probably owning a matching flashy car (probably a BMW 7 series as is precept and precedent) holding the sceptre over Arts and Culture.
“While viewing the artwork, Xingwana appeared most upset by the work of Muholi and Mntambo, which deals with intimacy between women.”
The artworks which scarred our dear Minister for life and caused all the brouhaha that the she couldn’t even read her speech was “… a series of photographs by prominent artist and lesbian activist Zanele Muholi, of naked, black women embracing each other, Xingwana slammed the work as “pornographic”, spoke to her aides, and left in a huff. Her personal assistant read out her speech.”
Yes indeed, the pious Minister cannot stand visually stunning and tasteful photographs of women which in fact does not even show societal taboos such as certain parts of breasts and “below the belt areas”. Those were all cleverly and indeed artistically covered. The Minister thinks it amounts to pornography. Now I wonder if the porn label only relates to the assumed gay imagery…
It is especially ironic and terribly regressive that this happened in very close proximity to the much esteemed South African Constitutional Court, hence why the precinct is known as Constitution Hill. This is the same Constitutional Court which scrapped old discriminatory statutes and effectively ordered Parliament to legalise same-sex marriage otherwise the old Marriage Act would have been amended by means of their pronouncement to be non-discriminatory. This same Court gives ultimatums to Government yet the Minister of Arts and Culture provides a nice symbolic desecration in return and tramples all over the Bill of Rights with her tantrum. Uncannily this Bill of Rights explicitly prohibits discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and provides freedom of speech as long as it doesn’t grossly violate another group’ rights.
The Minister was sweet enough to throw in the What-About-The-Children card as some kind of substantiation for her theatrics. This is quite odd when one considers that none of the imagery amounts to pornography. The artist says to the Times of South Africa in rebuttal that “…children need to know about these things. A lot of people who have no understanding of sexual orientation, people are suffering in silence…”
A constitutionally protected minority apparently has to be swept under the rug and children should preferably be protected from this constitutionally protected minority. A plethora of comments on articles covering this national disaster make complete fun of the supposed moral superiority of the new nationalists. The more things change the more they stay the same indeed — from one bunch of nationalists to another. Is anyone else seeing the pattern here?
This hideous event caught some attention beyond the South African borders as well when the Guardian in the UK reported on it. The Guardian states the delineating statement which should have tipped off Her Piousness:
In the exhibition’s catalogue, Muholi’s artwork is described as being “without precedent in South Africa, where there are very few instances of black women openly portraying female same-sex practices.”
The Minister however strongly denies it was the implied sexual orientation which caused all the ire as the Mail & Guardian reports that “[The Minister' personal assistant] denied that the minister objected to the fact that the women were lesbians. “I don’t think it’s based on sexual orientation. It’s more to do with the fact they’re not wearing clothes and engaging in what looks like sexual acts. The minister stands by what she did.’”
The Minister should have expected very substantial fallout. But then again maybe this is the direction the regime under Jacob Zuma is going. Just before the April 2009 general elections Mr Zuma played lay preacher at the Rhema Bible Church which is spearheaded by former World Iron Man wannabe Ray McCauley. Not long afterwards we learnt that Jacob Zuma in distinct demagogue fashion placed same-sex marriage rights and abortion on auction for the loudest sycophant when the earth-shattering news broke as elaborated on by the Mail & Guardian in Zuma’s new God squad wants liberal laws to go.
In February 2010 we learnt of the looming national debate on morality as envisaged by none other than Jacob Zuma. This came literally days after the discovery of the president’ umpteenth child and lover (the latest one being illegitimate). Some now rightfully wonders what practice what you preach means in modern day South Africa.
Annelie Lotriet of the official opposition party in South Africa, the Democratic Alliance (DA), released a very critical statement on Xingwana’ hissy fit calling the Minister a bigot with no capacity to uphold the Constitution and suggests that Xingwana should rather tender her resignation. The statement by the DA also states the history of Jacob Zuma’ bigoted utterances: “same sex marriage is a disgrace to the nation and to God. When I was growing up, ‘ungqingili’ [homosexuals in isiZulu] could not stand in front of me, I would knock him out.” Lotriet also reminds the reader that Jacob Zuma recently appointed the rabidly, anti-gay Jon Qwelane as ambassador to Uganda.
The DA further raises some concerns:
It would appear that, below the surface bigotry and prejudice run deep in the ANC. It is disgraceful.
If this government is serious about creating a genuine democracy built on a foundation of human rights, it needs to act against the kind of prejudice the Minister espouses. One would hope the Minister has enough perspective to sanction herself and resign, should her pride prevent her from doing so, President Jacob Zuma needs to take action.
Lastly it would only be befitting to get the opinion of a renowned South African artist and professor of fine arts, Penny Siopis.
“The fact is, as a minister she is a representative of our Constitution. It does not matter if she has a personal distaste for what she sees.”
If this kind of atavistic behaviour is a sign of things to come and some indication of the Zeitgeist within the ANC, I see a very gloomy future for the LGBTIQ community in South Africa. One can only hope that the Constitution is protected from the nationalists’ prejudice and conservativism. Bigotry knows no boundaries and symbolic gestures are often a taste of things to come.
Dr. Jack Drescher, M.D., is a psychiatrist and psychologist in private practice in New York City. He presented the second keynote address at the Anti-Heterosexism Conference in West Palm Beach, Florida, in November 2009.
Dr. Drescher has written and edited over 20 books regarding homosexuality and gender identity. His keynote, “STRAIGHT” Jackets: A Psychiatrist Deconstructs Sexual Conversion Therapies, speaks in great detail about the psychology and psychiatry of homosexuality and the ineffectiveness of so-called “conversion therapies.”
The conference organizers have now made video of this address available. Video length: about 48 minutes.
The Anti-Heterosexism Conference was co-sponsored by Soulforce, the National Black Justice Coalition, Truth Wins Out, Box Turtle Bulletin, Equality Florida, and Beyond Ex-Gay.
Opponents of antigay prejudice and arrogance gathered in south Florida two months ago at the Anti-Heterosexism Conference to expose the deceit of the ex-gay and antigay movements.
Dr. Sylvia Rhue, Ph.D., presented the first keynote. Dr. Rhue serves as Director of Religious Affairs with the National Black Justice Coalition and is a scholar, writer, educator and sought-after public speaker. The title of her presentation was “STRAIGHT” Rackets: Why the Religious Right Needs Reparative Therapy.
The conference organizers have now made video of this address available. Video length: about 58 minutes.
Homophobia in the black church is an artifact of archaeology, and not an artifact of faith.
Authoritarian religious movements, filled with fear and loathing, wage an ongoing war against love.
Ten years ago, the ex-gay movement patterned a national ad campaign in a fashion some found starkly reminiscent of past campaigns against Negroes. In those times, southern Americans, largely Baptist, would conduct castrations and lynchings on Saturday nights and worship on Sundays without a hint of schizophrenia or guilt.
Jesus is not in the orientation-changing business, because sexual orientation is God-given and morally neutral
From Fred Phelps to Harry Jackson, numerous Christian Rightists demonstrate a basic lack of understanding of human sexuality and a lack of empathy for the harm they do.
The need of some Christian Rightists to be at war with some segment of the population highlights a lack of integrity and confidence in their theology.
The word “homosexuality” was invented in 1869, didn’t arrive in states until the turn of century, and did not appear in the Bible until c. 1940 as a mistranslation.
Most evangelical youth leave their church, never to return: They want faith, but not their parents’ faith.
The Anti-Heterosexism Conference was co-sponsored by Soulforce, the National Black Justice Coalition, Truth Wins Out, Box Turtle Bulletin, Equality Florida, and Beyond Ex-Gay.
People who were spiritually and emotionally injured by “ex-gay” ministries and reparative therapy gathered in south Florida two months ago to reflect on their experiences and their recovery.
The conference organizers have now made video of these recollections available. Video length: about 50 minutes.
The Anti-Heterosexism Conference was co-sponsored by Soulforce, the National Black Justice Coalition, Truth Wins Out, Box Turtle Bulletin, Equality Florida, and Beyond Ex-Gay.
From November 20-22, advocates for lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) equality will join clergy, educators, mental health professionals and allies at the 2009 Anti-Heterosexism Conference in West Palm Beach, Florida. The conference offers a range of in-depth workshops and is open to everyone who seeks to challenge the harmful affects of heterosexism, reparative therapy, ex-gay ministries and other efforts to change people’ sexual orientation.
“First off, it’ important to be clear that the title of the conference is the Anti-Heterosexism Conference, not anti-heterosexual,” says Jeff Lutes, Executive Director of Soulforce and one of the organizers of the conference. “Heterosexism is the widespread assumption that heterosexual relationships are somehow superior to same-sex relationships, which leads to all kinds of abuse and discrimination against LGBT people. We want to highlight where heterosexism seeps into the social, cultural, religious and political fabric of society, and how we can begin to unravel its damaging consequences.”
Through a weekend-long series of workshops and keynote speakers, conference attendees will learn to challenge heterosexist attitudes and practices, speak out against the dangers of reparative therapy and other conversion efforts, and become strong advocates for LGBT equality.
Keynote speakers for the conference include Dr. Sylvia Rue, Interim Executive Director of the National Black Justice Coalition, Rev. Deborah L. Johnson of Inner Light Ministries, and Dr. Jack Drescher, Distinguished Fellow of the American Psychiatric Association. Joining Soulforce as co-sponsors of the conference are Truth Wins Out, the National Black Justice Coalition, Beyond Ex-Gay, Box Turtle Bulletin and Equality Florida.
The Anti-Heterosexism Conference also serves as a counterweight to the anti-gay think tank, NARTH (National Association for Research & Therapy of Homosexuality), which will be hosting its annual conference on the same weekend in West Palm Beach. For years NARTH has promoted reparative or “sexual orientation conversion” therapy, claiming that LGBT people can and should change their sexual orientation.
However, after a thorough review of the literature on conversion therapy, the American Psychological Association (APA) concluded that sexual orientation is unlikely to change through therapy and adopted a resolution in August 2009 calling on mental health professionals to avoid telling clients they can change from gay to straight through “therapeutic” efforts or other treatments. The resolution builds on an APA report from 1998, which warned that reparative therapy can lead patients to “depression, anxiety, and self-destructive behavior,” because “therapist alignment with societal prejudices against homosexuality may reinforce self-hatred already experienced by the patient.”
In November, individuals and organizations from across the country will come together for the Anti-Heterosexism Conference to work through the process of moving beyond the dangers of heterosexism to a more just and equitable environment for LGBT people. “It’ time we named the problem,” says Lutes, “and begin walking together through the solution.”
For more information on the conference, visit: http://www.soulforce.org/anti-heterosexism-conference
Advocates for lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) equality will join clergy, educators, mental health professionals and allies at the 2009 Anti-Heterosexism Conference in West Palm Beach, Florida, Nov. 20-22. The conference offers a range of in-depth workshops and is open to everyone who seeks to challenge the harmful affects of heterosexism, reparative therapy, ex-gay ministries and other efforts to change people’ sexual orientation.
“First off, it’ important to be clear that the title of the conference is the Anti-Heterosexism Conference, not anti-heterosexual,” says Jeff Lutes, Executive Director of Soulforce and one of the organizers of the conference. “Heterosexism is the widespread assumption that heterosexual relationships are somehow superior to same-sex relationships, which leads to all kinds of abuse and discrimination against LGBT people. We want to highlight where heterosexism seeps into the social, cultural, religious and political fabric of society, and how we can begin to unravel its damaging consequences.”
Through a weekend-long series of workshops and keynote speakers, conference attendees will learn to challenge heterosexist attitudes and practices, speak out against the dangers of reparative therapy and other conversion efforts, and become strong advocates for LGBT equality.
Keynote speakers for the conference include Dr. Sylvia Rue, Interim Executive Director of the National Black Justice Coalition, Rev. Deborah L. Johnson of Inner Light Ministries, and Dr. Jack Drescher, Distinguished Fellow of the American Psychiatric Association. Joining Soulforce as co-sponsors of the conference are Truth Wins Out, the National Black Justice Coalition, Beyond Ex-Gay, Box Turtle Bulletin and Equality Florida.
The Anti-Heterosexism Conference also serves as a counterweight to the anti-gay think tank, NARTH (National Association for Research & Therapy of Homosexuality), which will be hosting its annual conference on the same weekend in West Palm Beach. For years NARTH has promoted reparative or “sexual orientation conversion” therapy, claiming that LGBT people can and should change their sexual orientation.
However, after a thorough review of the literature on conversion therapy, the American Psychological Association (APA) concluded that sexual orientation is unlikely to change through therapy and adopted a resolution in August 2009 calling on mental health professionals to avoid telling clients they can change from gay to straight through “therapeutic” efforts or other treatments. The resolution builds on an APA report from 1998, which warned that reparative therapy can lead patients to “depression, anxiety, and self-destructive behavior,” because “therapist alignment with societal prejudices against homosexuality may reinforce self-hatred already experienced by the patient.”
In November, individuals and organizations from across the country will come together for the Anti-Heterosexism Conference to work through the process of moving beyond the dangers of heterosexism to a more just and equitable environment for LGBT people. “It’ time we named the problem,” says Lutes, “and begin walking together through the solution.”
An exciting lineup of workshops is planned for the 2009 Anti-Heterosexism Conference which will meet November 20-22 at the Crowne Plaza Hotel in West Palm Beach, Florida.
Before the conference, Beyond Ex-Gay will be hosting a pre-conference institute for ex-gay survivors as well as allies interested in combating the heterosexism that permeates and drives the ex-gay movement.
Conference keynote addresses and concurrent workshops include:
Straight Rackets: Why the Religious Right Needs Reparative Therapy Sylvia Rhue, Ph.D.
Microaggressions and the LGBT Community: Advocating for Social Justice on Individual, Institutional, and Societal Levels Kevin Nadal, Ph.D.; David Rivera, M.S.; Melissa Corpus, M.A.; Lauren Fisher, M.A.
Pray Away the Gay? Wayne Besen
Genocidal Intentions: Public Policy and the Ex-Gay Movement Christine Robinson, Ph.D.
“It Just Ain’t So”: Debunking the Myth of Gender Polarity Rev. Deborah L. Johnson
Heterosexism and Transgender Oppression Virginia Stephenson & Jordan Johnson
The Effects of Homophobic Stress in Childhood and Adolescence on Later Adult Psychological Functioning in Gay Men:A Model for Treatment
Dominic Carbone, Ph.D.
Getting It Straight: Ex-Gay Survivors and Their Therapeutic Needs Christine Bakke and Jallen Rix, Ed.D.
Media 101: How to Build and Deliver an Effective Message Brian Winfield
Body & Soul: Integrating Sexuality & Spirituality Timothy Palmer, M. Div.
Heterosexual Interrupted: What the Ex-Gay Movement Really Means By “Change” Jim Burroway
Media Access: Getting Through the Noise Gabriel Arana
Spiritual Self-Defense for LGBT Christians Rev. Candace Chellew
Queering Youth/Young Adult Activism Andi Gentile and Asher Kolieboi
Lessons Learned This Weekend: A Conversation About Implementing Effective Strategies In Our Communities
Marsha McDonough, Ph.D.; Paul W. Dodd, D.Min., L.P.C.
Straight Jackets: A Psychiatrist Deconstructs Sexual Conversion Therapies Jack Drescher, M.D.
To register for the conference, purchase an exhibit table, or become an individual or corporate sponsor, please click here. Early registration continues through October 5, 2009.
Straight Rackets: Why the Religious Right Needs Reparative Therapy
