Thers @ Whiskey Fire:

The Lord moves in mysterious ways, sometimes even sort of straight up and down with a firm grip mellowed by a little dab of Lubriderm.

He suggests that the two big stories of the week, that of the arrest of anti-gay street preacher Grant Storms, for wanking in a van by a playground with kiddies nearby, and the fact that batsh*t “prophet” Janet Porter has scheduled a fetus to testify on an abortion bill in Ohio are indeed related, as Storms may have just been “doing the Lord’s Work, that is, spontaneously creating thousands of tiny little witnesses that he was going to take to the nearest Congressional committee to testify about the evils of abortion.”

One day maybe I will be like Thers.

Thinking along similar lines is General JC Christian of Jesus’ General, who suggests that Pastor Storms might be able to help out with the Ohio hearings:

I believe I can get Pastor Grant Storms to provide your committee with a billion newly-freed Spematazoan-American witnesses. You may have heard of him. He promotes the heterosexual lifestyle by going to playgrounds, whipping out his holy staff, and liberating his trapped Spermatazoan-American brothers onto the monkey bars.

I don’t think it has to be monkey bars. I bet he’d liberate them onto the witness table’s microphone if that’d be more convenient.

AND scene.

I’m just pointing it out because anti-gay wingnuts are always other kinds of messed up wingnuts too:

A fetus has been scheduled as a legislative witness in Ohio on a unique bill that proposes outlawing abortions after the first heartbeat can be medically detected.

Faith2Action, the anti-abortion group that has targeted Ohio to pilot the measure, called the in-utero witness the youngest to ever come before the House Health Committee at 9 weeks old.

Faith2Action president Janet Folger Porter said the intent is to show lawmakers who will be affected by the bill, which abortion rights groups oppose.

My only question is what kind of ventriloquist puppet gymnastics Porter’s going to pull to make it answer questions, because Janet, that’s just not polite.

For a little background on Janet Folger Porter’s insane anti-gay activities, click here.

Leinaala Fruean spoke at the Religious Right’s May 1 rally in front of the Lincoln Memorial in Washington, “May Day 2010: A Cry To God For A Nation In Distress.” I was at the event and videotaped what can only be describes as a zealously zany sermon by Fruean.

Fruean represents Island Breeze Ministries in Hawaii. The woman next to her in the yellow shirt is the infamous televangelist Cindy Jacobs.

Enjoy the show! It’s Nutapalooza!! (And they call us crazy??)

Janet Porter has no shame.

Formerly Janet Folger, she launched the disastrous “Truth in Love” ex-gay advertising campaign in 1998, with 15 other anti-gay organizations.

Of course, we all know what happened. I photographed their poster boy, John Paulk, inside a gay bar in 2000. Along with attorney Michael Hamar, we also exposed their other spokesperson, Michael Johnston, for having orgies with men he met online.

Way to go Janet. Your campaign was a real “success”.

Instead of slinking off in shame, Porter/Folger is trying to make a comeback. She organized the failed “May Day: A Cry To God For A Nation In Distress” rally this month. No wonder why former Christian Coalition head, Ralph Reed derisively once referred to her as an “issues entrepreneur”. There is no depth she will not stoop, lie she won’t tell, or issue she will not opportunistically embrace.

Her latest outrage is an attack on Supreme Court nominee Elena Kagan. In an obnoxious “Action Alert”, Porter has a headline that reads: “Lesbian Nominated to Supreme Court.” What evidence does Porter have to make this allegation? Has she slept with Kagen?

In the Action Alert, her Faith 2 Action organization asks members to:

“Contact Chaplain Klingenschmitt’s Pray in Jesus Name organization can send a fax petition to all 100 U.S. Senators, or a couple of smaller groups of swing-vote or Judiciary Committee Senators on your behalf, opposing this nomination.”

Folger/Porter is up to her same old bag of despicable dirty tricks. She’s just a bundle of hype and hyperbole operating under the guise of fundamentalist Christianity.

Early this morning, I went to the heavily promoted, “May Day 2010: A Cry To God For A Nation In Distress.” It was organized by Janet Porter (formerly Folger in red jacket) who is best known for running the failed “ex-gay” Truth in Love ad campaign in 1998.

The event was a bust. Less than 300 (not official count, but my own estimate) people turned out in front of the Lincoln Memorial in Washington today to hear a star-studded line-up of evangelists and right wing political leaders. Organizers claimed from the stage that the event cost $70,000, so they had clearly expected an impressive turnout. The big names included the Family Research Council’s Tony Perkins, Generals International’s Cindy Jacobs (yellow shirt), Porno Pete Labarbera, Bob Knight and Alan Keyes. Here are a few pictures. We will have video later:

Read in The Miami Herald (Steve Rothaus)

For a time after its founder D. James Kennedy recently passed away, there was hope that Fort Lauderdale-based Coral Ridge Ministries would go in a new direction.

For decades, the church had been a rabidly anti-gay organization that had employed attack dogs, such as the notorious Janet Folger. The church spearheaded the 1998 “Truth in Love” ex-gay campaign. (It ended badly after two of the campaign’s stars were caught having gay relations) But since Kennedy’s departure, Coral Ridge had been relatively quiet on divisive social issues.

Unfortunately, it seems their new pastor, Rev. Tullian Tchividjian, wants to reignite the culture wars. His General in this fight is Robert Knight, a veteran in these battles. Knight had recently been laid off from the Media Research Center’s Culture and Media Institute. He had also worked for Concerned Women for America and the Family Research Council.

Already one can see Knight’s deleterious influence on Coral Ridge. The website’s homepage is packed with shameless lies about hate crime legislation and it also promotes theocracy in America. (This brings us back to Kennedy’s dishonest days when the pastor even flirted with Reconstructionsism – a brand of Christian fanaticism that calls for homosexuals to be stoned to death.)

Knight is best known for his paranoid – if not delusional – rantings about the gay movement’s secret desire to stamp out the free speech of radical Christians. He is one of the right’s most nefarious propagandists and is severely truth challenged. Knight is also known for his sexual immaturity and penchant to make crude anti-gay wisecracks. At one event I attended, he joked about chubby lesbians in beer halls. Knight is also obsessed with gay sex and is closest in tone to Peter Labarbera. The two men worked together in the late 90′s at the Family Research Council and were like bosom buddies.

It seems that preaching the Bible was not enough to sustain the congregation – so Coral Ridge has returned to anti-gay bile. On the sun-drenched shores of Fort Lauderdale, Coral Ridge Ministries is still in the spiritual darkness.