Every time I think that the gay wingnut group GOProud has sunk to the lowest possible level of organized self-loathing, they find a way to strap the cilice on just a little bit tighter.  It is well documented that Michele Bachmann does not like gay people.  She considers her own lesbian family member’s sexuality to be “part of Satan.”  Her husband runs a clinic without a license where he offers reparative therapy practices to any clients already abused enough to put themselves through it.  She has made a large part of her career on opposing gay people and supporting bigoted, hateful policies against us.  So of course, GOProud wants her autograph.

As gay-issue advocacy groups increase pressure on Minnesota Rep. Michele Bachmann over her views about homosexuality, the gay conservative group GOProud is requesting a meeting with the Republican presidential candidate to possibly lend a hand.

GOProud Executive Director Jimmy LaSalvia said that representatives with the organization have already met with some of the GOP candidates to discuss GOProud’s legislative agenda–including a commitment to defeat a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage, which Bachmann supports–and they hope Bachmann will grant them some face time.

“We have requested a meeting with Michele Bachmann,” LaSalvia told The Ticket. “We’ve made this request, as with the other requests, in good faith.” He said GOProud officials intend to “discuss issues important to gay conservatives” with Bachmann and “anything she wishes to talk about.”

Chris Barron says he’s “concerned” about some of the things Michele has said in the past, but as the article points out, GOProud’s agenda isn’t really about anything resembling civil equality for gays and lesbians. They’re mostly a troupe of disaffected white men who value their white privilege and tax cuts above anything else.  When they cozy up to Mitt Romney or someone like that, it’s annoying.  To cozy up to the most supreme bigot running for the highest office in the land [Rick Perry isn't officially in yet] is gross and more than a little bit sad.

Gay conservatives are just like other gays! There’s not anything about their ideology that betrays fundamental psychological issues ranging from general self-loathing to a pathetic willingness to worship at the altar of people who view them as second class citizens, or anything like that! I mean, look at this breathless press release from Jimmy LaSalvia and Chris Barron of GOProud. Nothing pitiable here!

(Washington, D.C.) – Today, GOProud, the only national organization representing gay conservatives and their allies, announced that conservative author Ann Coulter is headlining their first annual Homocon – a party to celebrate gay conservatives. “The gay left has done their best to take all the fun out of politics, with their endless list of boycotts and protests. Homocon is going to be our annual effort to counter the ‘no fun police’ on the left,” said Christopher Barron, Chairman of the Board of GOProud. “I can’t think of any conservative more fun to headline our inaugural party then the self-professed ‘right-wing Judy Garland’ – Ann Coulter.”

Ann Coulter is the author of seven New York Times bestsellers —Guilty: Liberal Victims and Their Assault on America (January 2009); If Democrats Had Any Brains, They’d Be Republicans (October, 2007); Godless: The Church of Liberalism (June 2006); How to Talk to a Liberal (If You Must)(October, 2004); Treason: Liberal Treachery From the Cold War to the War on Terrorism (June 2003); Slander: Liberal Lies About the American Right (June 2002); and High Crimes and Misdemeanors: The Case Against Bill Clinton (August 1998).

Homocon 2010 will take place in New York City on the evening of Saturday September 25th. VIP Sponsorships are available for $2500 and general admission tickets go on sale August 20th. To purchase tickets or for more information: www.goproud.org.

“I can promise you, Homocon 2010 will be a hell of a lot more fun than chaining yourself to the White House fence,” concluded Barron.

So basically, Ann Coulter will show up in whatever slutty black dress she found on the floor that morning, she’ll show up and deliver her brand of humor, which is discernible only to wingnuts, a bunch of bitter queens will say things like “Oh, you GO, gurl!” and shout “DIVA!,” and then she’ll collect her check and leave the starstruck fan boys behind to awkwardly fight the remaining demons in the room and grouse about how The Rest Of The Gays don’t make them feel welcome at their tea dances. Also…in what way, shape or form is Ann Coulter the “Judy Garland” of anything? I’d say she’s the Judy Garland of Adam’s Apples, but a horde of drag queens, past and present, would vociferously disagree.

Sounds like quite a night.

For the record, here are some of the things Ann Coulter has said about gay people, slurs she has used, courtesy of Jeremy:

One student asked what she would do if she had a child who came out as gay.

Coulter replied: “I’d say, `Did I ever tell you you’re adopted?’” [SOURCE]

Do I really need to post anything else that she’s said? Doesn’t that one statement show what kind of Stockholm Syndrome we’re dealing with? Here’s Ann talking about how Mike Huckabee is TOO PRO-GAY for her bigoted liking:

Huckabee claims he opposes gay marriage and says Scalia is his favorite justice, but he supports a Supreme Court decision denounced by Scalia for paving the way to a “constitutional right” to gay marriage. I guess Huckabee is one of those pro-sodomy, pro-gay marriage, pro-evolution evangelical Christians.”

What’s next, GOProud boys? Would you like me to see if I could get you some of Anita Bryant’s bathwater for you to use as the base for jello shots at your party?

I am not a gay conservative…to say the least. And I’ve questioned in the past the wisdom of GOProud, the gay conservative group, participating at CPAC along with groups that want to legislate away their dignity. I still question that wisdom. They’ve been sending out reports from CPAC along the lines of “Nobody has beat us up yet, so that means conservatives aren’t bigots after all!” They’re also stupidly suggesting that because Dick Cheney got a standing ovation, that the wingnuts are somehow supportive of gays because Dick Cheney supports gays.

It’s pathetic. Newsflash: Wingnuts like Dick Cheney because Dick Cheney is a torture-mongering ghoul, and wingnuts are weak people, so they feel strengthened by the idea of torturing people, as long as they don’t have to personally exhibit any strength or courage of their own.

Anyway. I don’t care how nice people are to the gay CPAC-ers; what matters is what policies they support. Lots of people are nice to people they hate, especially Southerners, who I would imagine are overrepresented at Winguttapalooza. It’s so ingrained in our culture that we have code phrases that express disdain while always being able to claim the mantle of gentility. (“Bless her heart.”) So personally, the fact that the gay conservatives haven’t been shot at yet at CPAC isn’t impressive.

Also, they’re dealing with the fact that the GOP line on their dignity and existence is that they shouldn’t have any. Consider this quote from Chris Plante, who’s running the National Organization for Marriage (nom nom nom) booth just a few feet away:

“Gays and lesbians have the right to live as they choose, but they don’t have the right to redefine marriage for the rest of us,” Plante said.

Uh huh, right. And believe me, NOM is more welcome there than GOProud is. Again, I don’t care now nice and polite CPAC-ers are to the gays in their midst. The fact that gay conservatives are impressed and excited to be included without having to wear pink triangles is pathetic and reveals the self-loathing and the deeply ingrained beliefs in their own inferiority that we’ve always seen in them.

Meanwhile, an insane press conference happened, featuring Elaine Donnelly, Queen of the 101st Chairborne Brigade, and Tom Minnery of Focus on the Family (who apparently can’t pronounce the word “debacle”), who projected their pathetic Fear of the Gay onto our brave troops as they came out in opposing DADT repeal. Also speaking were know-nothing Tony Perkins and David Keene, who organized the entire conference. Oh, also, there was an old retired admiral who probably had to be helped onto the stage, testifying about his 1930′s version of reality. Watch it if you want, but you’ll lose a few brain cells.

All of that being said, though, this video of Jimmy LaSalvia, the King of the Gay Wingnuts, is pretty funny:

ZING! The boys at the NOM booth are total pansies! On that, we agree.

Anyway, so there you go. Jimmy LaSalvia made a funny and nobody’s been gay-bashed yet at CPAC. Glad to see, again, that they’re persevering in their quest to win the gay rights battles of the 1970′s.

UPDATE: Okay, so all of that being said, this video is also funny. Ryan Sorba, a hysterical and likely closeted anti-gay activist, decided to take to the stage and condemn CPAC for inviting GOProud to the event, and he was received poorly by some in the room. What I notice is that at the beginning, some were booing him, and some were cheering him, but as his childish tantrum grew more hysterical, the boos got louder. Mike Madden at Salon’s War Room opened his report on this by saying, “Turns out CPAC isn’t quite the place for insane jeremiads against homosexuality.” I would suggest, rather, a more balanced reaction, because if you click on the link above to watch the aforementioned press conference, you’ll see that there is indeed a place for insane jeremiads against homosexuality at CPAC. It seems to me that what’s become socially unacceptable, even in CPAC, is the kind of frothing, unhinged anti-gay ranting that’s the hallmark of Ryan Sorba’s “career.” I guarantee you that, for a lot of people in that room, their issue is not the content of Sorba’s tirade, but rather the unfiltered nature of it, because they know that their bigotry is not acceptable in intelligent society. So NOM and Elaine Donnelly and Tom Minnery are fine with them. The rhetorical equivalent of playing with your dingleberries on stage, as exhibited by Ryan Sorba, is not.

Pretty funny, though.

If you missed the event he’s referencing, where the students at Smith College exposed Sorba for the embarrassment he is, click the clicky and laugh.