Sun to Set On Focus on the Family’ Infamous “Pray Away The Gay’ Road Show
BIRMINGHAM — Truth Wins Out (TWO) announced today that its Founder, Wayne Besen, would speak on the dangers of the “ex-gay’ myth on Thursday (7PM) at the University of Alabama Birmingham. The UAB presentation coincides with Focus on the Family’ final Love Won Out conference, which they sold to Exodus International in the midst of financial trouble. TWO has worked with local gay advocates across the nation to stage protests against Love Won Out, and in 2000, Besen photographed its “ex-gay” organizer, John Paulk, in a Washington, DC gay bar.
The multi-media presentation is sponsored by UAB’ Office of the Vice President for Equity and Diversity, The Alliance for GLBT Equality at UAB, Equality Alabama Birmingham, Central Alabama Pride, Covenant Community Church and PFLAG.
The event will take place Thursday (7PM) at Hill University Center Alumni Auditorium, 1400 University Blvd. It’ on the NE corner of University & 14th Street S.
“The sun is setting on a dangerous program that has brought much darkness and pain to families across America,” said Wayne Besen, Founder and Executive Director of Truth Wins Out. “I look forward to sharing the history of misery and misinformation Love Won Out has brought to countless people. I hope to get out the facts and let gay and lesbian people know they are fine just the way they are.”
Throughout the week, Besen will join a coalition of Alabama gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender advocates responding to Focus on the Family’ Love Won Out conference, which encourages people to “pray away the gay.” This includes a protest at the “Love Won Out” conference at Metropolitan Church of God. The peaceful protest is planned on public right of way near the entrance of the church, which faces Interstate 459 near the Acton Road exit. (Read More)
Focus on the Family will shed its controversial Love Won Out program for transforming homosexuals into heterosexuals because of budget troubles, the conservative media ministry said Tuesday.
The Love Won Out conferences on “leaving homosexuality” will be handed over in November to a longtime ministry partner, Orlando, Fla.-based Exodus International.
“The economic challenges led us to this strategic decision,” Focus vice president Gary Schneeberger said Wednesday. “Love Won Out is not an inexpensive event to stage, and rarely, in over 50 cities where it’s been held, have we ever made back our investment, despite good attendance.”
Focus on the Family, which held its first Love Won Out conference in 1998, will lead its last on Nov. 7 in Birmingham, Ala. A $6 million shortfall in the $138 million budget also caused Focus president Jim Daly to send out a fundraising letter to 800,000 donors.
“Right now we’re facing a serious budget shortfall that threatens our ability to reach out to parents, families and married couples who count on our help,” Daly wrote. “I want to assure you we’re committed to good stewardship and living within our means, just as so many families are today.”
Schneeberger said one staff position will be eliminated and further cost-cutting measures are under consideration.
Wayne Besen, a gay activist with the group Truth Wins Out, said conference crowds are getting smaller and drawing less media attention.
“There is a shrinking market for their product,” Besen said. “This is a very positive development, because it shows Focus on the Family wants to get out of the ex-gay business ‚Äî though not completely. But if this were something they were really vested in, they would have kept it in-house.”
Facing a $6 million budget shortfall, Focus on the Family is shifting control of its Love Won Out conference to an outside organization.
Exodus International, a group that claims people can overcome unwanted same-sex attractions with the help of its ministry, announced Tuesday it will take control of the program starting in November.
“Exodus is the ideal organization to transition Love Won Out to,” said Melissa Fryrear, director of Love Won Out. She noted that Focus on the Family and Exodus have been closely aligned for years.
That move comes at this time in part, Fryrear said, because Focus on the Family’ income is down $6 million from what was expected for this year.
The shortfall was recently cited in an e-mail appeal to donors.
Alan Chambers, director of Exodus, said his group is financially equipped to take over Love Won Out, but the move was in the making for years. Focus on the Family planned to provide financial support by providing speakers and marketing assistance.
Wayne Besen, a gay activist whose organization, Truth Wins Out, decries so-called “ex-gay” therapy, said he was not surprised at the development. He noted that Exodus “has acted as an unofficial subsidiary of Focus on the Family” for years.
“Focus on the Family claims that they are facing a $6 million shortfall,” he said. “If they can eliminate a few positions due to this change, it will benefit their bottom line. This is especially true, because we suspect that Love Won Out is slowly losing support as gay people gain more acceptance each year.
The crowds appear smaller and the road show has received less media coverage than it has in the past.
“If they are downsizing, it is because the market for such misinformation has continued to shrink.”
But Chambers said Love Won Out was coming to Exodus in part so it could be operated by a more narrowly focused organization.
I’m on my way to Grand Rapids, Michigan to give a presentation at Grand Valley State University on the harm caused by the “ex-gay” industry. My speech, followed by a panel discussion, is in response to Focus on the Family’s traveling road show, Love Won Out, which will be in town on Saturday. Having countered several of these conferences, I must confess, I still don’t understand what point they are trying to make.
If Focus on the Family’s goal is to convert gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people into evangelical Christians, they are doing a lousy job. It seems convincing gay people to end their relationships is a far higher priority to this ministry than having gay people develop personal relationships with Jesus Christ.
For every guilt-ridden homosexual who temporarily falls under their spell, they lose hundreds, if not thousands, of gay people who view their conversion program as intolerant. If your ministry causes many gay people to write off not just Christianity, but all religion, by what measurement can you consider your evangelizing a success?
At Love Won Out, speakers go to great lengths to profess their deep concern over the mental and physical well being of homosexuals. It turns out, however, that the anti-gay sentiment expressed at these conferences may be hazardous to the health of GLBT people.
A new Emory University study concludes that the bans on same-sex marriage pushed by Focus on the Family can be tied to a rise in the rate of HIV infection. The scientists found that a constitutional ban on marriage equality raised the rate by four cases per 100,000 people.
“We found the effects of tolerance for gays on HIV to be statistically significant and robust, they hold up under a range of empirical models,” says Hugo Mialon, an assistant professor of economics. “Intolerance is deadly,” Mialon said. “Bans on gay marriage codify intolerance, causing more gay people to shift to underground sexual behaviors that carry more risk.”
Earlier this year, a study by San Francisco State’s Caitlin Ryan concluded that “teens who experienced negative feedback (when they came out) were more than eight times as likely to have attempted suicide, nearly six times as vulnerable to severe depression and more than three times at risk of drug use.”
So, if Love Won Out is truly concerned about the health of gay people, particularly teenagers, it will transform into a gay affirming ministry. To continue down their destructive path of judgmental condemnation is senseless and significantly harmful to the very GLBT people that Focus purports to want to help.
Of course, Focus on the Family will insist that they love gay people and just want to help those who are unhappy. But, isn’t it a conflict of interest when you lobby to pass anti-gay laws that make gay people miserable and then offer yourself up as the panacea to the pain? Is it not hypocritical to sponsor a conference supposedly about love, where the main speaker is Alan Chambers, president of Exodus International?
Chambers hosts a Christian television show, Pure Passion, which pollutes the airwaves by repeatedly calling gay people “sexually broken” and “perverse.” Exodus also sells “Pursuing Sexual Wholeness” a book authored by Andy Comiskey that says, “Satan delights in homosexual perversion.” Such pronouncements are often accompanied by exorcisms given by churches affiliated with ex-gay ministries. Obviously, such extreme actions are anathema to creating a welcoming church environment for GLBT people.
Focus on the Family also claims its conferences are for parents, friends, family members or ministry leaders who want to “lovingly reach out with uncompromised faith.”
Genuine love, of course, requires making the very compromises and sacrifices that Love Won Out is telling people are unnecessary. Rejecting a friend or family member’s innate sexual orientation as sinful and defective, rarely leads to a healthy relationship based on trust and mutual respect.
Finally, the investigative reporter Thomas Maier just released a groundbreaking book, “Masters of Sex.” In it, he reveals that the famed sex research team, Masters and Johnson, had fabricated claims of curing gay people in their 1979 book, “Homosexuality in Perspective.” Given this vital new information, why hasn’t Focus on the Family taken the opportunity to review and question the validity of its program? Wouldn’t that be the moral course of action to take?
The hard truth is, Focus on the Family’s leaders are only capable of loving people exactly like themselves, which explains their tremendous efforts to remake gays in their image. While their splashy road show may get high marks for good theatre, it’s ultimately futile because their transparent version of “love” rarely wins converts and succeeds only at convincing most gay people to run out of the church door.
The gross hypocrisy and outright cynicism is difficult to believe.
Focus on the Family is bringing their notorious “ex-gay” road show, Love Won Out, to Grand Rapids, Michigan this week. In response, Grand Valley State University is hosting my presentation, followed by a panel discussion on the danger of ex-gay programs.
Focus on the Family is livid and demands that the panel include anti-gay Focus on the Family speaker Michael Brown. They are urging their huge mailing list to complain and bully university officials.
“The ‘Religion and Homophobia’ panel discussion seems awfully one-sided for an event sponsored by the school’s ‘inclusion and equity’ department,” wrote Gary Schneeberger, vice president of media and public relations at Focus on the Family.
Focus on the Family might be taken seriously if they had actually extended an invitation to gay advocates and pro-gay preachers to speak at Love Won Out. I’d be more than happy to present my slide show, “Pray Away The Gay” on Saturday, at the Focus on the Family event. I’d even bring along the original photograph I took of Love Won Out’ ex-gay founder, John Paulk, (pictured) fleeing a gay bar.
Unfortunately, no such invitation was forthcoming. It seems that Focus on the Family has a double standard when it comes to inclusion and diversity. They demand representation, yet do not have the decency, manners and common courtesy to extend an invitation of their own. And, they wonder why their assertions of “love” and “morality” are deemed politically motivated and insincere.
If you are encouraged that Grand Valley is offering this program — “Religion and Homophobia: Spiritual Violence in our Community” — then let the university know: 616-331-2221.
If you are in Michigan and would like to attend the panel, please visit www.TruthWinsOut.org for more information.
Exclusive Truth Wins Out interview with Thomas Maier
For decades, anti-gay organizations have gleefully pointed to Masters & Johnson’s 1979 book, “Homosexuality in Perspective”, that claimed to cure homosexuality. Indeed, Dr. William H. Masters and Virgina E. Johnson, the husband and wife sex research team, went on Meet the Press on Sunday, April 22, 1979, to discuss their finding that homosexuals could be converted into heterosexuals. The book has since been used by the so-called “ex-gay” industry to “prove” gays could go straight, if they just tried hard enough.
In his groundbreaking new book, “Masters of Sex”, author Thomas Maier discovered through investigative reporting that the results of Masters & Johnson’s study were entirely fabricated. Virginia Johnson acknowledged that the results were fake. She had actually argued in 1978 that book should never have seen the light of day – but it was already to late in the publishing process to undo the damage.
One can not overstate the importance of Maier’s findings. They undo the very underpinnings of the so-called “ex-gay” therapy movement, further showing that there is no scientific evidence or data to support the outdated idea that gay people can become heterosexual through therapy. Indeed, many people who have undergone such “treatment” claim the experience was harmful and that they were psychologically damaged. The American Psychiatric Association says that attempts to change sexual orientation can lead to “anxiety, depression and self-destructive behavior.”
TWO Thanks Grand Valley State For Terrific Event Discussing The “Ex-Gay” Industry
NEW YORK — Truth Wins Out thanked Grand Valley State University for hosting a top-notch event that evaluated the claims made by the “ex-gay” industry. In front of several hundred people, TWO’s Executive Director, Wayne Besen, spoke about the harm done by Focus on the Family’s Love Won Out conference, which will be in Grand Rapids on Saturday. Following his talk, he participated on a distinguished panel with local experts including:
• John Corvino, Wayne State University professor, author and lecturer;
‚Ä¢ Milt Ford, director of Grand Valley’ LGBT Resource Center;
• Judith Snow, Grand Rapids area forensic therapist and author;
• Doug Van Doren, pastor of Plymouth Congregational United Church of Christ;
• Josh Sleutel, GVSU student, previous reparative therapy patient.
Besen will take-part in a protest response to Love Won Out on Saturday, hosted by the National Organization of Women. ( June 13 at the Calder Plaza from noon-1pm)
“We thank Grand Valley State University, the LGBT resource center – and particularly Dr. Milt Ford and Colette Seguin Beighley – for organizing an amazing event that had a community-wide impact,” said Wayne Besen, Executive Director of Truth Wins Out. “I hope people in Grand Rapids will join me at the NOW protest on Saturday, so we can help the parents and children being targeted by Focus on the Family. Our participation in such events helps people come out and even saves lives.”
The actual legislation is available to read online: Senate Bill 909, and the recently passed House bill H.R. 1913.
The bills make penalties (sentences) that already exist under federal hate crimes available to be applied to those already convicted of existing crimes of felony violence. Until now, felony violence committed against heterosexual or homosexual persons has been sentenced less harshly under federal hate-crime law than violence committed on the basis of what the perpetrator assumes to be the race or religion of the victim. Both bills correct that injustice, by 1) ensuring that heterosexuals and homosexuals receive equal treatment, and 2) ensuring that when a perpetrator assaults a heterosexual person based on the perpetrator’s mistaken assumption that the victim is gay, the felony is not punished less harshly.
Instead of linking to or quoting the actual legislation, Focus on the Family falsely states that the legislation “would create a new class of crimes” and falsely states that the legislation punishes speech by antigay pastors.
Worse, Focus on the Family abandons any pretense (borrowed, perhaps from its “Love Won Out” ex-gay roadshow?) of loving same-sex-attracted persons. Focus equates same-sex-attracted victims of violent crime with pedophiles. Focus states:
Even more concerning, the legislation could create special protection for pedophiles.
Sexual orientation is already defined in law and in psychiatry as an attraction to men, women, or both — not to children. Focus on the Family falsely insinuates that sexual orientation can be interpreted as an attraction to children.
Those complicit in Focus’ declaration of hate against the victims of violent antigay crime included James Dobson; Focus’ top lobbyist Tom Minnery; Gary Bauer; Rep. Louie Gohmert, R-Tex.; and Rep. Steve King, R-Iowa.
It is an odd time to be gay in America. Whether you are celebrated or despised depends on where you stand at any given moment.
The most dramatic example of this dichotomy occurred on Sunday evening at the Academy Awards. To attend the glamorous event, one had to drive past anti-gay protesters shouting vile condemnations of homosexuality. Once inside, guests were treated to perhaps the most pro-gay Oscar extravaganza in history.
First, openly gay Dustin Lance Black won Best Original Screenplay for “Milk”. Black gave a moving acceptance speech to thunderous applause and told GLBT youth that they were “beautiful, wonderful creatures of value…no matter what anyone tells you.”
The icing on the cake was superstar Sean Penn’ remarks after winning an Oscar for his role as Harvey Milk.
“For those who saw the signs of hatred as our cars drove in tonight, and, I think that it is a good time for those who voted for the ban against gay marriage to sit and reflect and anticipate their great shame and the shame in their grandchildren’ eyes if they continue that way of support.”
The GLBT community has come a long way. It is now acceptable for top tier straight men to play gay roles without it negatively impacting their careers. This is no small achievement and we should be quite grateful to have obliterated this barrier that once seemed insurmountable. (Let’ not forget Tom Hanks who played a gay man with AIDS in Philadelphia.)
Before we sip the Champagne, we should remember that there is still an ongoing taboo against openly gay actors playing leading men in Hollywood. On the morning of the Oscars, the New York Times Magazine wrote a profile on actor Rupert Everett discussing the obstacles he faced as a result of coming out. The article spoke of the time he was turned down for a major movie role because of his sexual orientation. An MGM executive told his agent, “to all intents and purposes, a homosexual was a pervert in the eyes of America.”
Clearly, some glass ceilings still need to be shattered. It should be a major priority among GLBT activists to make sure this breakthrough in Hollywood comes to fruition.
Equally jarring was my experience in Charlotte, North Carolina this past week. My organization, Truth Wins Out, traveled there to counter Focus on the Family’ “Love Won Out” conference, where they teach people to “pray away the gay.”
On a beautiful Saturday morning, I broke away from our protest group to attend a seminar at Love Won Out. It was heartbreaking to see more young people than I ever had before at this traveling “ex-gay” road show. There was a cardboard sign that read “Youth Track”, and several teenagers — some that appeared not much older than 13 — were being taken inside by their desperate and confused parents.
Outside the conference were many dedicated local activists, such as Matt Comer, who organized our protest. Counter-protesters from Operation Save America greeted us. They preached that in 1973 the Lord turned against America. In this year, they said, God was angered by Roe v. Wade, the American Psychiatric Association removing homosexuality from its list of mental disorders and Israel’ war with the Arabs. Yeah — this is a bizarre conclusion to draw, but one that compelled about one dozen troglodytes to bring signs calling us “whoremongers.”
On the other side of town, the Human Rights Campaign held its annual North Carolina dinner. Much like those who attended the Academy Awards, attendees were greeted by belligerent Bible-thumpers who shouted Scripture into megaphones.
The dinner itself was an elegant affair that featured an excellent motivational speech by HRC Executive Director Joe Solmonese and a keynote address by Sen. Kay Hagen (D-NC). It was truly inspiring to hear Sen. Hagen, who occupied the seat once held by the notorious Jesse Helms. (R-NC).
The week ended with a hateful ad by The Policy Council of West Virginia, which compares same-sex marriage supporters to snipers targeting families. The more we progress, it seems the more our opponents regress and resort to shrill and bombastic attacks.
At any given moment, GLBT people are portrayed as either wonderful or wicked. While it is still painful to be put down, I can’t help but notice that when it counts — whether in Hollywood or Charlotte — it is we who are increasingly on the inside. While our opponents could win Oscars for their dramatic protest performances, they certainly can’t like the way the script is unfolding.
(Published In The Charlotte Observer, Feb. 21, 2009)
By Wayne Besen
As long as prejudice and discrimination exist, some gay men and lesbians will feel pressure to try to change their sexual orientation. Unfortunately, there are organizations, such as Focus on the Family, that exploit such vulnerable people and their fears of rejection by family, church and society. On Saturday, Focus on the Family will roll into town with its much-hyped road show, “Love Won Out,” which offers false hope and broken promises.
It is important that one realize that such efforts are rejected by every mainstream medical and mental health organization in America, such as the American Psychological Association, American Medical Association and the American Academy of Pediatrics. The America Psychiatric Association says that attempts to change sexual orientation can cause, “Anxiety, depression and self-destructive behavior.”
Without science on their side, Focus on the Family has taken to distorting research. In the past two years, eight scientists have accused this group of manipulating their studies. The testimonies of these experts can be viewed at www.Respectmyresearch.org.
The empirical evidence also suggests that people can’t “pray away the gay.” For example, I photographed the “ex-gay” founder of Love Won Out, John Paulk, in a gay bar in 2001. Two of the founders of Exodus International, Michael Bussee and Gary Cooper, divorced their wives after they fell in love.
This week Truth Wins Out and Lambda Legal released a publication, “Ex-Gay & The Law,” to help victims of such “therapies” understand their legal rights. There is also the problem of broken families. Focus on the Family loves to show people wedding photos. But, it would be more honest if they showed the divorce papers, which are a common outcome of such sexual engineering efforts.
More disturbing are conversion techniques. These include exorcisms and encouraging masculinity in male clients by suggesting they drink Gatorade and call friends “dude”. Sadly, these groups even take clients as young as three years old!
A new study by Caitlin Ryan shows that gay teens who experienced “negative feedback” by family members were more than eight times as likely to have attempted suicide, nearly six times as vulnerable to severe depression and more than three times at risk of drug use. Clearly, Love Won Out is the very negative feedback that can produce such harmful results.
Love will truly win out when gay and lesbian people can live out of the closet with the unconditional acceptance, love and support they deserve.
Wayne Besen is the founder of Truth Wins Out (www.TruthWinsOut.org). He is also the author of “Anything But Straight: Unmasking the Scandals and Lies Behind the Ex-Gay Myth.”
With a gift of $35 to Truth Wins Out, you can receive an autographed copy of "Anything But Straight: Unmasking the Scandals and Lies Behind the Ex-Gay Myth."
Sun to Set On Focus on the Family’ Infamous “Pray Away The Gay’ Road Show 
